Toni Natalie Might Consider Writing Porn

Toni Natalie

Editor’s Note: Shivani has offered a fairly unflattering look at author, Toni Natalie, whose book, The Program: Inside the Mind of Keith Raniere and the Rise and Fall of NXIVM, [Grand Central Publishing] has elicited some criticism of Natalie’s character and raised questions about her veracity, by those who know her true life story.

It has also raised questions about why Grand Central Publishing did not vet her book prior to publishing it.

Some who have been mentioned in the book have told Frank Report that her stories about them have been fabricated. They have made a convincing case.

[In fairness to Toni, the passages about me [Frank Parlato] are mostly accurate with one notable exception. I’ll get to that in a later post.]

Shivani’s article is in response to K.R. Claviger’s, Toni Natalie Is Really, Really, Really Pretty – Just Ask Her wherein Claviger points out that Natalie, in her book, repeatedly describes herself as pretty and quotes others who say she is pretty.

You can’t read the book without getting the impression that Toni thinks she is pretty and thinks that others think so too.

To explain the references below to Keith Raniere’s “meaty thumbs”, it comes from Toni’s book.

In his post, Claviger quoted from Natalie’s book, [as Keith was holding Toni’s hands he was] “rubbing his meaty thumb into the contours of my palm, surveying my life line, my love line, my fate line… He gazed deep into my eyes, and I met his gaze—his bright blues burning into my greens. ‘You have lovely eyes’, he said matter-of-factly”. 

Claviger went on to write of this passage: And ‘Yes’, dear Frank Report readers, I did laugh out loud when I read what shall forever be known as ‘the meaty thumb passage’.”

Shivani’s opinions are her own and do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the editors of the Frank Report.

By Shivani

K.R. Claviger, a snippet of one of your marvelous lines, “One night when he [Keith Raniere] was visiting her in her Best Western hotel room…” had me in stitches out on the patio. That tidbit kind of says it all.

Parked, like a sorry ass, in a Best Western, while her new boyfriend lives with three of his real and more significant other wimmens, all of whom are shrunken and seemed to have stopped menstruating. How appetizing. The OGs are supposed to go trawling for his teenage selections, and Toni doesn’t have any cute little girls?

How uncool is that for such a stark raving ‘bee-you-tee’?

All this is getting too sexy, as Toni sits on her thumb and rotates four or five nights out of seven! While Meaty Thumb dawdles and splits his time, doing his gosh darndest to share the abuse. Gawd how erotic.

But why stop there, when this ‘laydee’ promoted herself to such altitudes of self-help? She found her way dauntlessly and left her husband and their little boy for a meaty thumbful of cum, a fat-faced, 5’5″ woodchuck with a hairdo like a backup singer from Herman’s Hermits?

Keith Raniere when he was with Toni Natalie – and had her and her son on low calories diets.

Image result for hermans hermits

Getting it on, bébé.

She was experiment #35 amongst Keithie-Weethie’s second-stringer mature gals. Toni joined a troop of spitting camels who never wore deodorant and had to rent her own condo, all for love of the great Flabturb, her Vanguard, ya know.

But this is not about the meaty thumb. This is all about, could it be, it is! All about “miss piggy’s CONTOURS.”

As the two specimens stroked each other’s cloven hooves and grunted gutturally in mutual self-admiration until the thrill was gone. I dunno who wrote Toni’s novelette for her, but she might find new autobiographical life writing porn and making imitation gangsta gestures in front of multiple prisons. Strike a pose.

It wasn’t fair to make fun of a myopic orangutan’s hairdo without offering a similar review of Natalie’s hairdressing skillz, while taking in her profile photo below, where she gazes at her harem master like an epicurean raptor.

For hers is the exact same coiffure that I used to see while gazing down from balconies into the predawn streets of Mumbai. That was when the immense city rats, considerably larger than fatass American house cats, would be getting ready to go to bed for the day. These gigantic rats all wore their head fur exactly like Toni’s in her profile shot, with unruly, casual sprigs of hairiness matted down the sides of their faces, for a youthful look. It was fascinating how vigorous and sporty they looked, but they bullied each other and were uncouth.

From Toni to woodchucks, to camels, to piggies, too myopic orangutans, to raptors, to rats and we must have at least one old goat before we get back, as is adamantly required by Toni, to Toni.

Another tiny indignity, like a finale, a Tchaikovsky death scene starring Toni, of course, with stage settings and notes she needs to memorize before dress rehearsal. She has to stop being too flummoxed. Toni must learn how to respond to semi-blindness more on cue.

Acute myopia has a way of looking outward into a miasma of vagueness. Yet very often that nearsighted way of looking appears to someone looking into its gaze to be quite hypnotically focused upon him or her.

It can be terribly enticing.

But alas. Myopics are more likely to be just kind of staring, not bothering to try using their elongated eye muscles to contract or to focus, ’cause they won’t. Those kind of eyes can be almost unseeing but can look omnipresent. Happy Halloween though, Toni. It was all you, all of the time.

Perhaps try to settle the fuck down now. Everybody got the naked telegram.

Even though Toni might’ve been peeing with eagerness while in the courtroom and doing the old “look at me” jiggle and eyelash batting/ hair-tossing like a nanny goat in heat, what was the point?

Raniere, her ex, her dimestore conboy, her bisexual Albany std and HPV Rasputin, probably just saw a batch of fuzzy people. Aphrodite Natalie is no spring chicken, either. She ought to know that he prefers to unzip younger veal coulottes, not to work up a sweat tugging off some old lady’s underpants.

Hey, maybe that’s how come Natalie co-wrote her spiritually-advanced memoir, as a way of gracefully accepting her passage into the resurrection of Deep Throat, the new age dowager queen of overstocked and expired cosmetics, hard work and Best Western hotel booty, um, bee-you-tee.

Toni Natalie is triumphant – with Keith Raniere in prison and with her new book – she has a lot to feel happy about. But some are unhappy because they claim she dishonestly portrayed them in her book.

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  • I dunno Shivani, I don’t think anyone ‘writes’ porn so much, more stage manages it toward what used to be known as the ‘money-shot’ most recently eclipsed by the ‘bukkake’ phenomenon which is the equivalent of a mob of gangsters in a club ‘making it rain’ by throwing money over the ladies. Times change.

    Something about your tone puts me in mind of Luella Parsons. I like it.

  • You have to love the Front Page Picture of Toni
    Is this her Porn Picture or what?
    Really bad filler in the bottom lip
    That come “get me” look in her eyes
    Boob job, just big enough to stick out the side of her shirt
    Yep the perfect Porn Picture

    • Are u kidding?

      They’d be tossed out of S.F. Valley for not being hardcore enough and for having cankles.

      1) Have you never heard of Bukkake?

      That’s a porn shoot where 10-75 guys shoot their loads onto a woman’s face and into her mouth, and all over her.

      2) Have you never heard of Golden Showers or Watersports?

      That’s similar to a Bukkake video, but instead of jizzing on the gal they take a piss on her.

      3) Have you never heard of blowbangs with facials?

      That’s a massive group blowjob ending with lots of ‘pop-shots’ to the gal’s face.

      Guess what?

      The gals of NXIVM weren’t nearly hardcore enough for shit like that.

      According to Lauren’s testimony, she seemed a bit apprehensive about giving Keith a simple group blowjob with just 3 or 4 other gals, which means there’d only be ONE guy and ONE load of jizz to take.

      …That’s NOTHING for porn gals, yet Lauren Salzman was hesitant about doing that?

      ==========

      PS — As for putting the porn industry in San Fernando Valley to shame, try asking Niceguy about his apparent fondness for Cleveland Steamers. That’s SICK!!! He’s a sick bastard. 🙂

      • Dearest Bangkok,

        Just a few things:

        1.) You seem to be well versed in the pornography industry jargon. Now we all know what you do in your spare time.

        2.) Sorry Bangkok, Toni Natlie could do GILF porn. According to recent reports Natlie can perform on gymnastic rings, so getting “freight trained” by 30 guys in a gangbang should not be an issue. Since Natlie has near plastic skin now, getting hit with all those facials(money shots) should be a snap.

        3.) Good news Lauren Salzman is single. Those batwing Labia are awaiting you.

        4.) I do not like Cleveland Steamers. I do love Blumpkins. Just ask your mom.

        5.) I believe I could have been your father, but 5 guys came before me.

        6.) You are still a dipshit.

        7.) How many rose buds have your Grandpa and family’s Mexican gardners given you in total?

        Have a good night dipshit!

  • Shivani I’m sorry but have you ever even seen a porno? ” For hers is the exact same coiffure that I used to see while gazing down from balconies into the predawn streets of Mumbai.” I kind of get the sense that you have put yourself on a lonely pedestal. I could be wrong of course. “These gigantic rats all wore their head fur exactly like Toni’s in her profile shot, with unruly, casual sprigs of hairiness matted down the sides of their faces, for a youthful look. It was fascinating how vigorous and sporty they looked, but they bullied each other and were uncouth”. Im confused. Are you talking about real rats or are you referring to women? In my opinion, while you were gazing, you were probably seeing a true reflection of your self and didn’t like it. Of course, I could be wrong.
    I would encourage Toni to please never write anything unless its an apology to the people she lied about.

    Cumming soon!
    Meaty Thumbs XXX
    Meaty Thumbs The Rise and Fall of a Mafia Princess
    Meaty Thumbs XXX Escape to a Mexican Closet
    Carne Pulgar Pandilla Violacio`n

    • Yeah, once when my husband and father-in-law went on a vacation, my dear, late m.i.l. and I rented a couple of porn flicks, for investigative purposes, no longer willing to let ourselves be so culturally deprived. However, that was way back in 1989.
      Tee-hee. Our viewing party fell off very,very quickly, when after laughing our heads off, we were decidedly bored and found it all so unromantically repugnant. The terrible background muzak the swinging genitalia.

      Once upon a time there was an otherwise very Adonis-like man (a childhood best buddy) who tried sharing porn with me, but again, it seemed so pathetic, so lame, repetitive and devoutly empty of any heart, soul or even intelligence. But whatever floats your boat.

      Perhaps if you were interested in reading with some receptivity, contemplativeness, concentration or effortful reading comprehension, you could answer your own questions. In the meantime, I will go on taking risks with my own thoughts and self- expression, which no one is forcing anyone to read at all. A brief analysis of what is happening here will show you that you can’t touch this, but y’all can still try to get moving and try building your own fire.

      • Also, I met John Holmes (Johnny Wadd, the cocaine-addled porn star) and sat through an indescribable dinner, party of five, with him and his porngirl match for the movie which was being shot then, in 1978 or so. Quelle surprise, huh? That was more than a decade before I saw any porn, though.

        The man who shot the original footage for the weekly introductory segment of Hawaii Five-O, where the giant waves were crashing, invited us to this dinner…and to so much more! These people were phenomenally ughly and dead inside and out, but at least I got a good baked ziti before saying “no thank you.” As I said, ughly.

      • This swinging 1989 genitalia sounds visually disturbing. Let me see if I can comprehend what you wrote. Your husband and father in law goes on vacation. You then have a viewing party with the pornos you rented for an investigation? I find this behavior odd. Your writing style is unusual to me. “A brief analysis of what is happening here will show you that you can’t touch this, but y’all can still try to get moving and try building your own fire.” Do you see how when you say these things it leaves a reader like me confused? And by all means express your self more. Open up and tell us how you really feel.

  • Toni will never be able to have the marvelous sex she had with keith and that’s why she is bitter. Memories haunt her. There is nothing like the hellish fury she has after he dumped her.

    • Pea, aka Nicki:
      This afternoon I was reading a story in the New York Times about an RCMP officer (Canadian Mountie to us Yanks) named Cameron Ortis.
      It seems Officer Ortis was a Dudley Do Wrong who sold encrypted phones to criminal gangs.
      That story got me to thinking, Pea aka Nicki.
      Are the members of NXIVM still using encrypted phones to covertly communicate?
      Last year your friend Frank Parlato wrote a detailed story how the members of NXIVM were using cellphones with the TELEGRAM encryption program to secretly communicate.

      “Nxians were away from encrypted phones during the time Legatus was @ Saratoga
      October 21, 2018

      “(S)he said that the remaining members of NXIVM cult are now communicating through an encrypted program called Telegram.

      They are always on their Telegram program, [used on cell phones] and have a network led by Esther Chiappone Carlson for Albany/Clifton Park and Omar Boone for Monterrey, Mexico.

      Some of them use aliases and it was not immediately clear who, while she was in Clifton Park [or at other times], Clare Bronfman has been in contact with them via Telegram”

      https://frankreport.com/2018/10/21/nxians-were-away-from-encrypted-phones-during-the-time-legatus-was-saratoga/

      Are you guys in NXIVM still using Telegram to secretly communicate?
      Are Clare, Allison, Nancy, Lauren and Kathy all using
      Telegram to communicate?
      Is that why all of Raniere’s co-defendants decided to plead guilty at about the same time?
      Because they are all secretly communicating?

    • According to several sources, Keith is incapable of performing marvelous sex any longer. His woody had gone limp.

      Maybe some fellows at the MDC are enjoying Keith doing the YMCA with them.

  • This is Toni This is Toni This is Toni This is the Toni Take Down Report. This is the Toni Fake Report. This is TTTTTTOOOOOONNNNNIII Toni Toni Toni

About the Author

Frank Parlato is an investigative journalist.

His work has been cited in hundreds of news outlets, like The New York Times, The Daily Mail, VICE News, CBS News, Fox News, New York Post, New York Daily News, Oxygen, Rolling Stone, People Magazine, The Sun, The Times of London, CBS Inside Edition, among many others in all five continents.

His work to expose and take down NXIVM is featured in books like “Captive” by Catherine Oxenberg, “Scarred” by Sarah Edmonson, “The Program” by Toni Natalie, and “NXIVM. La Secta Que Sedujo al Poder en México” by Juan Alberto Vasquez.

Parlato has been prominently featured on HBO’s docuseries “The Vow” and was the lead investigator and coordinating producer for Investigation Discovery’s “The Lost Women of NXIVM.” Parlato was also credited in the Starz docuseries "Seduced" for saving 'slave' women from being branded and escaping the sex-slave cult known as DOS.

Additionally, Parlato’s coverage of the group OneTaste, starting in 2018, helped spark an FBI investigation, which led to indictments of two of its leaders in 2023.

Parlato appeared on the Nancy Grace Show, Beyond the Headlines with Gretchen Carlson, Dr. Oz, American Greed, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt, where Parlato conducted the first-ever interview with Keith Raniere after his arrest. This was ironic, as many credit Parlato as one of the primary architects of his arrest and the cratering of the cult he founded.

Parlato is a consulting producer and appears in TNT's The Heiress and the Sex Cult, which premiered on May 22, 2022. Most recently, he consulted and appeared on Tubi's "Branded and Brainwashed: Inside NXIVM," which aired January, 2023.

IMDb — Frank Parlato

Contact Frank with tips or for help.
Phone / Text: (305) 783-7083
Email: frankparlato@gmail.com

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