Kim Snyder Thrashes Commenters Who Tried to Impugn Her Family’s Motives and Actions in Quest to Find Kristin Snyder

MK10ART's painting of Kristin Snyder kayaking
Kim Snyder

By Kim Snyder

A number of comments appeared seeking to pick holes in my post about the days of horror my family experienced when we first found out my sister, Kristin Snyder, was missing.

Some of them are sincere I suppose – and some are cowardly remarks induced by anonymous posters who grow brave from knowing that they don’t have to put their names where their ugly mouths are.

My post was Kim Snyder: How Nxivm Tried to Gaslight My Family Following Kristin’s Disappearance

Here are a few of the comments/questions and my responses.

That’s a very important question. She was close to us, but she was also an adult woman living her own independent, married life, thousands of miles away. I don’t know why her spouse, Heidi, did not call us during the week of her descent into madness.  She called us after the fact not before.
If she had called us to tell us how Kristin was acting, we could have come before she disappeared.
And knowing my dad and mom – there is nothing in the world Esther Chiappone Carlson could have said that would have prevented them from insisting that Kristin go to the hospital. Then we would have known if she was drugged, if she was pregnant, and if she was really experiencing this utterly new and sudden descent in her personality.
I think she was drugged.
Had anyone told us that Kristin was claiming she was pregnant – even after her disappearance – we would have reported it to police and not kept it a secret like all the Nxivm people and Heidi did too.  Heidi had a reason. As she said on camera in “The Lost Women of Nxivm”, she was afraid to tell police for she thought it might bring suspicion to her. She was the spouse – and police might have thought she was behind her disappearance.
This showed that Heidi – even then – suspected the suicide story might not be true. But we – the family – were not given the advantage of knowing one of the single most important facts of this entire mystery.
As for Elaine Smiloff and I assume any of the others – like [Name Redacted] – who were interviewed by police – the monster woman – Esther Chiappone Carlson – was there when police were asking other people questions.
Elaine told Frank that Esther sat in during her interview and advised her beforehand how to handle the police. She did not dare tell police that Kristin was claiming to have been pregnant.
This shocking omission – misled police.
Heidi told Frank that she did not just tell police that Kristin headed for Seward. She gave them numerous possible locations – all places where Kristin was known to frequent including Resurrection Bay.
This is the thing that haunts my mother and me. And haunted my father. Nobody informed the family. When we last saw Kris – she was exuberant about Nxivm but she was not exhibiting any dangerous signs. While we were concerned about her infatuation with Nxivm, it had not taken the turn of instability or madness.
I really think that it was her finding out she was pregnant and the very likely drugging – on top of the constant gaslighting – that pushed her into madness – so that no one would believe she was pregnant with Keith’s child no matter how many times she said it.
What happened on the fateful day or night is not known. Maybe they pushed her to suicide and she did it herself or maybe they helped her. Whether anything more than her truck and a suicide note wound up in Resurrection Bay is something I don’t know. But I think Esther Chiappone Carlson and others know. Keith knows. Nancy Salzman knows.
But these three liars would go to their graves and hell before telling the truth.
Heidi had an additional problem to confront. She was attending the ESP class with her mother who had Alzheimer’s.  They were told – and they spent a lot of money on this – that her mother could be cured by the classes.
On top of that, Esther, [Name Redacted], Ed Kinum and others were constantly assuring her that a with a few more classes and EMs – Kristin would turn the corner. And that they had seen many students react like this and it was a passing thing that she would grow out of soon.  Heidi bought into the bullshit.
They – Kristin and Heidi – invested $16,000 or more into this ESP intensive. They believed in it. I think Heidi refused to recognize the real danger and believed Esther – who is a cunning and persuasive monster and can be very firm also.
Esther did not get a green sash – one of only about a dozen in the history of Nxivm –- for nothing.  A green sash means you are a stunning liar.
I don’t disagree with this. Though I do think Heidi thought Kristin was dead. She now wanted to make sure that she did not get blamed for something she did not do – cause it.  By this time, and I don’t know – you would have to ask Heidi – she was shocked, upset, afraid, and she knew what the collective Nxivm folks could do. She was not strong enough to go against them.
Our family would have done so had we known what we know now.
We weren’t overanxious. We did not have the information that would have led us to believe anything other than the official story. We were told she was suicidal. We were told that bodies drowning in Resurrection Bay often disappear.
We were not told about the pregnancy claim. We did not know about [Name Redacted] lying or the great extent that Esther and others went to in order to gaslight my sister.
We honestly thought it was true – that my sister fell apart – without much prompting – and killed herself. We not only had Heidi supporting this – but also all the Nxivm monsters. But we did not know they were monsters. The great art of Nxivm monsters is to not appear to be monsters at first.
Where is the evidence that Kristin had sex with Keith — or even met him? Theories and hearsay don’t count, nor does the purported “recollections” of potential suspects. Is there ANY actual proof of any trip to Albany? Is there ANY actual proof that Kristin may have been pregnant? 
There are enough independent witnesses who now corroborate it. Heidi finally admitted it. Elaine Smiloff admitted it to Frank. And ironically, Clare Bronfman told her IT man Matt Malone that Keith told her that Kristin Snyder was pregnant – and that was before Elaine and Heidi made their confessions.
As for her being in Albany – yes, we not only have Susan Dones’ eyewitness account of her seeing her there – but we have Kristin’s credit card bill –,which shows charges in Albany.

Why all of a sudden is the Snyder family interested in KS’s disappearance now???? They were not at the service Heidi Clifford put on in 2003. If the Snyder family was in Alaska, why did Heidi not include them in the email she sent out notifying friends and family of the service????

Your ignorance is only superseded by your ASS-umptions. We have always been interested in her disappearance.  We did not have the facts and a worthy ally like Frank Parlato until recently. We thought the official story was true. We had no idea how evil Keith was until recently either. His trial – and Frank’s reports – opened our eyes to the possibility of murder.

We decided at the time to put the date of her death as February 7, 2003. She disappeared on February 6, but by the time she would have gotten to Seward – after being dropped off at home [the official story] – we thought it quite likely that she committed suicide after midnight.  We did not know for sure. In the end, it was just a guess. But we had to put some date on the stone.

Today, we know even less as to the true date she died. She may have been drugged and held for a time – for days, much like they did with the Mexican student they force-fed and sneaked Valium into. [Good thing she calmed down or she might have disappeared too.] Or they may have hired someone to murder Kristin on the day she disappeared. I don’t know the date she died.

Heidi states very clearly in several news articles SHE sold THEIR truck to help pay toward Kristin’s debts. Why is Kim 17 years later saying something totally different?

Heidi did not sell the truck the same day Kristin disappeared. We used the truck while we were in Anchorage. Heidi sold it later – she said – to pay off Kristin’s debt to ESP that these rapacious and scheming monsters still wanted.

Despite the ESP course [or Keith] destroying my sister, they weren’t going to back off on collections. I think it was a way of intimidating Heidi. Their bold collection demands. Our family would have never paid it. But we were not told and it was out of our control. Heidi was the executor of the will and inherited everything Kris had – which was not much other than her truck.

What kind of family brings a dead dog thousands of miles to look for their family member whom might well still be very much alive? Why was Kristin already dead to her family?

Your unusual lack of intelligence is only superseded by your ability to make hasty assumptions. We did not bring the dog’s ashes with us. Kristin kept those ashes with her at her home in Anchorage. They were already in Anchorage and so we spread those on Resurrection Bay at the private Memorial – because she loved the dog so dearly. It was the closest thing we had to her ashes. It was a little, tiny comfort to us. Sorry it offended you.

Ummm KSs family stayed where? Heidi’s, a marine base, and then a hotel??? Huh?

We originally stayed at Heidi and Kris’s house. It was quite hectic and we were already traumatized. So we moved to the hotel near the Marine base. My dad was a career Marine officer. It was a comfort to us to be there where he could be among his fellow Marines. Do not begrudge us getting a hotel to sleep at.  Bereaved families who go out of town on such errands as ours have to sleep somewhere. And sleep, quiet sleep, is sometimes the only comfort.

Why would the Snyders grab the dog’s ashes on the way out their door to grab the next plane to Anchorage — (which was literally not possible in a post-9/11 world)? Presumably, Kristin was missing, but potentially alive, at that point.

We did not grab the ashes. They were already in Alaska at Kris’s home.

Why were both Heidi and the Snyders so very ready to declare Kristin dead within a week of her disappearance, when the huge majority of loved ones of missing people still hold onto hope decades later? No wonder law enforcement dropped the ball — Kristin didn’t have ANY loved ones who fought continuously and relentlessly for the truth.

We believed at the time that the official story was true. And we were grieving.  I think we all believed Kristin was dead. And that was the overwhelming thing about the experience. We did not suspect foul play at the time and so we acted accordingly.
A lot has changed since then – and armed with what we now know, we intend to try to find out what really happened to my sister.  We appreciate the help Frank Parlato has offered us and the team at Investigation Discovery, Pat McGee and Phil Lott of Ample Entertainment.
We hope the FBI and the Alaska State Police will be sufficiently interested to investigate this matter.  I would suggest they start with Esther Chiappone Carlson.
MK10ART – Keith Raniere and his co-conspirator Esther Chiappone Carlson. Look out for these two. Together, they are ruthless.


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  • I don’t know what AnonyMaker is smoking, but it must be some pretty good stuff, based on the nonsensical nature of his/her “thinking” in this set of comments. To recap: yes, there were indeed flight restrictions after 9/11; no, commenting about the questions that have arisen recently is not a “culty mindset” in any way, shape, or form and it is bizarre that AnonyMaker would make such a claim; and the only people who are “not thinking things through” here are the ones who are failing to question the myriad nonsensical elements of the current mythological claims surrounding what happened to Kristin. Finally, yeah, everyone knows what presumptive death is — but that was never the point.

    • To begin with, I was referring to some of the more culty commenters here – not everyone, but unfortunately not just one person, either.

      There weren’t flight restrictions that would have resulted in what someone was hypothesizing (I travel quite a bit and was actually scheduled to fly a day or two after 9/11 when the air stop was still in force, and flew not long after instead, and remember what security was like), and I believe that came from the same person who made the strange claim about Snyder’s dogs ashes that was both wrong, and hadn’t been through through.

      The point is that the Certificate of Presumptive Death was issued by a court after a jury reviewed evidence and likely took testimony, voted unanimously and had their verdict affirmed by a judge, so the original determination of the authorities was subject to further oversight and confirmation, and we know nothing of that process and what information or sources that we don’t even know about, might have been taken into account – for all we know, Clifford, Kinnum, Ciappone, Smiloff, [Name Redacted], Abney, or others might have testified, and documents we’ve never seen been examined, things that could significantly change how we view the case.

      People are completely missing key pieces of the puzzle, certainly so much so that it’s premature to conclude that both the law enforcement investigation and the judicial process were somehow wrong, in a case that in some ways may not make sense in the way we might desire no matter how you look at it, including that both of the two alternate theories (besides the one re-affirmed official finding) require their own sorts of leaps of faith.

  • Kim, I’ve been meaning to thank you for this series of posts. They have given us a lot of really valuable insight into the details of what happened, and particularly the family’s knowledge and perspective at the time.

    Unfortunately, your last post seems to have attracted some of the sort of people who theorize without thinking things through – I’m at a loss as to why someone would assume Kristin’s dog’s ashes would be in South Carolina, or not stop to consider that the family could have arranged to have them sent along even if they were – as well as some toxic trolls and/or NXians. Strangely for a nominally anti-cult forum, there seem to be a lot of commenters here with just the same sort of culty mindset as the NXians themselves – prone to black-and-white beliefs and an us-against-them mentality, and so on.

    That new information has emerged about what happened, and how devious the NXians could be, doesn’t necessarily change the ultimate conclusion about Kristen’s fate, and the determinations that seasoned law enforcement professionals, and a court and jury, made about what happened – though it certainly raises issues and questions, that ought to be looked into and answered. It’s all too easy to buy into a theory as if it were true; the NXians themselves have their own sort of conspiracy theory, more comfortable for them to believe than the official findings, that Kristin staged her disappearance is still alive, apparently bolstered by certain supposed evidence, and believed by knowledgeable former insiders like Keefe and O’Hara.

    Also, other accounts of yours make clear that Kristin’s troubling behavior went back months. While it became acute during the intensive, there was a bigger problem, and if NXians did try to give her drugs – which seems unlikely without her partner knowing about it – then that was likely more a response to the situation, than a cause.

    And I haven’t seen it previously mentioned that “Clare Bronfman told her IT man Matt Malone that Keith told her that Kristin Snyder was pregnant.” What is the source for that, and is it really reliable?

    • Don’t you mean ESP? Remember this is 2003, NOT 2020! Least we point out there is absolutely NO evidence that Kristin Snyder ever attended any ESP seminars, because she didn’t!


      • You’re correct, Nutjob. I’m not quite sure where that perception came from – but what I believe is that there is zero hard evidence to prove that Kristin is alive or that she’s dead. That said, if I had to guess, I’d say that she’s likely dead – but not via the suicide scenario that appears, IMO, to have been set-up.

        • Joe, thanks for chiming in. I must have mis-read or mis-understood your nuanced position – I apologize for having mis-represented it.

          Do you think the NXIANs running the intensive in Alaska could have been capable of pulling off a murder staged as a suicide, and successfully fooling the authorities? Or even Salzman and Raniere?

          • Once again, let me emphasize that there are very few “purely objective facts” in this case. That means that all of the current theories are based on lots of assumptions, lots of things that other people say happened, and lots of our trying to fill in the gaps between the few “purely objective facts” that we have.

            For example: It’s been reported by several sources that Kristin was acting out in the intensive – and by several other sources that she was claiming to be pregnant with Raniere’s baby. But we don’t know why she was acting out: it could have been because of the pregnancy – and her uncertainty as to what to do about it; it could have been because of her concern about how the pregnancy would affect her relationship with Heidi; it could have been because she was experiencing a psychotic breakdown; or it could been because of numerous other causes.

            I think all we really know is that Kristin left the intensive class – and that her truck showed up in Seward the next day with some messages written into some notebooks. To me, those appear to be the only “purely objective facts” in this case.

            So, lots of things could have happened to Kristin.

            As for me, I do not think that Kristin committed suicide at Resurrection Bay if for no other reason than the scene there seems “staged” to me.

            I think it’s more likely that someone from NXIVM tried to calm Kristin down by administering some sort of sedative – and, in doing so, inadvertently killed her. If that’s what happened, then Keith and Nancy would have likely ordered that her body be buried somewhere else (Probably to the North) – and that the fake suicide scene be put together.

            What do you think?

      • Nutjob, thanks for that bit of information. It’s still hearsay even if not too far removed, and much as I’d like to see confirmation of what was actually going on, the history of situations like this is that details often get lost in the telling – much like the old game of “telephone” so it’s a toss-up at best as to how reliable that is.

        I’ve seen O’Hara quoted as saying he thinks Snyder is still alive, however he imagines that came about. Presumably Keefe still believes the whole NXIVM conspiracy theory about it.

  • The OFFICIAL story is she is MISSING! Yet according to Kimmy, her family is packing bathing attire for their trip to Alaska? Huh? Her family does not stay with Kristin’s partner, they instead stay at a military base? Huh?? Her family’s immediate response was to take the remains of Kristin’s and Heidi’s dogs ashes and dump them with people they do not know and cannot name in a place they do not know Kristin’s remains are? Who TF does that?

    If her family was not homophobes why did Kristin leave home the second she was able? She moved across the country to attend a college far away from the Snyder’s and she kept moving away from them!

    What kind of supporting family uses their legal kinship to supercede Kristin’s partner? WTF is this, a 2003 version of If These Walls Could Talk 2 and Heidi is Vanessa Redgrave! I wondered why when watching Frank’s documentary that Heidi didn’t seem to have much of anything left of Kristin’s, now it’s obvious (thanks Kimmy) her homophobic family TOOK Kristin’s belongings! Nothing Heidi could do legally because their domestic partnership was only legal at that time in Vermont!!!!!

    And Kimmy I am going to let you in on a little secret, something homophobes are blissfully unaware, the Lesbian community is tight! Even prior to the world wide web, we know each other, we find each other, we keep each other’s secrets, but more importantly Kimmy, we are FAMILY to each other! Real family! That being said Kimmy, I have a question for you, since you were so close and all to Kristin, when Kristin was getting her Master’s in KY, tell me the first name of her girlfriend she was with at that time? An ex she remained friends with and whom I personally am related to btw.

    Also Kimmy, why haven’t you spent a fraction of the time and money you have spent making plastic bead bracelets on finding what happened to your sister???? You had Dr Phil interested in your bracelets, yet didn’t bother to get him interested in your sister’s case? You said in this very post Kimmy, NO BODY under Kristin’s grave marker. Natalee Holloway’s mother knows her daughter is dead but continues to do everything within her power to try and find Natalees’s remains, to give her baby a proper burrial and put her soul to rest. Your family buried her dog’s ashes and didn’t look back. You never once contacted the APD and SPD to ask about Kristin’s case. Who does that?


  • It is the duty of law enforcement to NOT accept everything at face value. How many times do we see on true-crime shows where a spouse says that the husband/wife ran away with another person, or committed suicide, or had an accident, etc., when (surprise! gasp!), that is not what happened at all — just as an example of one common scenario. Or, in Kristin’s case, where a sane, successful person suddenly allegedly went “crazy” (but there’s clearly more to the story…). It seems to me that many of the questions that are arising are because there is vital information that wasn’t presented at the time — and even the new information that we are seeing now often seems inconsistent, bizarre, illogical, and/or perplexing. There is no way this situation EVER should have seemed like an “open-and-shut suicide”, IMHO. I am glad that people (and yes, that means even the people who are asking all of the awkward & uncomfortable questions) are finally trying to consider ALL available information. For Kim to attempt to “thrash” commenters for asking legitimate questions about Kristin’s disappearance is certainly understandable from the standpoint of feeling defensive, but ultimately, it is always myopic and unproductive to squelch questioning. It is time for everyone to STOP attempting to silence/shame people who don’t automatically buy into the story-du-jour.

  • I asked Kim to comment to the previous post about the identity and manner of her sister’s “women friends” who showed up and accompanied her to the Memorial. There may be something to learn from focusing on Espians who aren’t center stage.

    I hope she responds.

    Stories” we make up and utilize link events and people for us, but there’s always a lot more going on than what’s included in our story, or in the forefront of our mind, and thus a lot is left out of our awareness from the start or even just forgotten. In a mystery situation especially it deserves probing.

    What did Kim think their agenda was? Why did she think they accompanied her? Were they assigned that task? Did they invite themselves– I doubt she reached out to invite them to go with her–but maybe she did. It’s easier to imagine them descending on her for their own reasons. Hard to forget they didn’t try to help her sister at the intensive. Who was there?

    Did she perceive them to be authentic and caring? or out to manipulate her, albeit in a friendly or fun way?. Those observations from Kim could provide a clue as to what ESP as a whole from the top, and these espians individually on the ground, were doing at this Memorial, in Alaska, post-Kristin’s disappearance.

    Don’t discount getting insight from the lesser players, for they may not hide themselves or lie so completely as the big guys.. And, You gotta start somewhere— and most of the players do not seem to be coming forward with helpful information, nor are many of others providing info about them.

  • From many of the questions I have seen, it seems that Heidi’s actions are the ones being questioned the most. The questions about Kim (and her parents) seem more like confusion over details of the timeline/situation, rather than questioning the Snyders’ motives, but I may have missed a lot. Anyway, the questions addressed here and elsewhere regarding why Heidi didn’t seek help for Kristin and why she declared her dead within a week are the ones I would like answered. And why the police didn’t ask those questions.

    • The police didn’t ask such questions because it seemed like a pretty open-and-shut suicide

      And, that court and jury we’ve never heard anything about, which issued the Certificate of Presumptive Death, agreed, after reviewing evidence and perhaps even interviewing witnesses and compelling testimony.*

      I think that Kim has provided a reasonable explanation of Heidi Clifford’s actions in general, and specifically for what happened after Kristin Snyder’s disappearance, though it does seem that we have an incomplete picture to understand why Clifford was not more concerned about her partner’s deterioration, and particularly her strange claims, not just during the intensive but in the months leading up to it.


      Rule 32 – Presumption of Death
      (a) Petition. Any interested person desiring to establish the presumption of death of a missing person in cases authorized by statute may file a verified petition in a district court in the district where it is believed the missing person has suffered death or in the district where such person last resided prior to the person’s disappearance. The petition shall show the following:
      (1) The name of the person believed to have suffered death.
      (2) The circumstances leading to such belief.
      (3) That after due and diligent search such person cannot be found.
      (b) Jury. If the court is satisfied that the circumstances surrounding the disappearance of the missing person afford reasonable grounds for believing that such person has suffered death, the court shall summon and impanel a jury of qualified persons. The members of the jury, before beginning their duties, shall be sworn to diligently inquire into and justly consider all the facts and circumstances concerning the disappearance of the missing person, and from a fair consideration thereof to determine whether the court is justified in entering an order declaring that such person is presumed to be dead.
      (c) Hearing. The jury shall inquire into the facts set forth in the petition. The testimony of witnesses under oath shall be heard and other evidence presented as upon the trial of an action. Depositions may be accepted where the magistrate judge believes that travel time and costs do not warrant a personal appearance.
      (d) Verdict-Approval by Court-Order. After having heard all of the evidence presented, the jury shall retire for deliberation. If by its unanimous verdict in writing the jury finds that it may be fairly presumed that the missing person has suffered death, the court must endorse upon the verdict its approval or disapproval of such findings. If approval is given, the court shall enter an order declaring that the missing person is presumed to be dead. The order shall take effect at the expiration of six months from the date that the jury’s findings and verdict are approved, except that in cases where there is clear and convincing evidence of the presumed death the order will take effect at such earlier time as the court shall specify therein.
      (e) Presumptive Death Certificate. After the order of approval referred to in subdivision (d) has become effective or upon receiving a copy of an order or decree of the superior court that a person has not been heard of for a period of five continuous years and is presumed to be dead, the magistrate judge shall make out, sign, and file with the Bureau of Vital Statistics a presumptive death certificate containing such information as may be required by the bureau. On the effective date of the order of presumptive death, the missing person shall be presumed to be dead, and the person’s estate may be administered in accordance with the then existing provisions of law applicable to the administration of the estates of deceased persons.
      (f) Correction of Presumptive Death Order and Certificate. If the body of the missing person is found, or such person is discovered to be alive after an order of presumptive death has been entered, the court shall conduct a hearing, with or without a jury, to determine the facts, and shall enter an appropriate order for the correction, substitution or removal by the Bureau of Vital Statistics of the presumptive death certificate in accordance with the findings made if additional facts are brought to light.
      Alaska Dist. Ct. R. Civ. P. 32

      Renumbered by SCO 225 effective February 2, 1976; amended by SCO 554 effective April 4, 1983; by SCO 899 effective January 15, 1989; by SCO 1153 effective July 15, 1994; and by SCO 1605 effective October 15, 2006; and by SCO 1829 effective October 1, 2014.

      AS 09.55.020 (d) CROSS REFERENCE: AS 09.55.030 (e) CROSS REFERENCE: AS 09.55.050 (f) ;CROSS REFERENCE: AS 09.55.060

  • Those were not stupid questions (& only a complete idiot would think that they were). There’s no need to be dramatic or rude — because in mysterious cases such as Kristin’s, there are always a huge number of questions which need to be addressed, and quite frankly, these points weren’t clear in previous posts. Regardless of Kim’s panties clearly being in a huge wad about being questioned about things that she herself had failed to explain well previously, what matters here is finding out what happened to Kristin. KRISTIN. Not Kim. Not Heidi. Not the Snyders, or Keith, or Frank Parlato, or Mr. Amway. KRISTIN IS THE VICTIM HERE. Focus. FOCUS. Put on your big girl pants, people.

  • These are all very stupid questions from soap-opera/wannabe Inspector Clouseau types. One comment Snyder did not address: getting on an airplane post 911 is not difficult. People travel for emergency purposes all the time, whether it’s for a death, business meeting, etc. A question Snyder did not answer, because it wasn’t published, is why did the issue of NXIVM accusing someone in Kristin Snyder’s family raping Kristin when she was a young girl not come up until recently?

    • That mistaken assumption about post-9/11 is just the sort of logical and factual failing that clown posse conspiracy theories are full of – Kim Snyder shows here that there’s so much it’s easy to miss some.

      At the end I believe you’re referring to some sort of abuse allegation that has only been mentioned in passing in accounts of how Kristin Snyder was interacting with her family in the run up to the fateful intensive, which came from something like a supposed traumatic memory that had come up for Kristen Snyder during her NXIVM involvement. Based on what I know about about such groups and the techniques they use, I’d say it most likely came from EMs, which are similar to Scientology “auditing” sessions, and use hypnotic-like regression techniques that attempt to address past trauma, which can seem impressive and feel cathartic, but can also make some subjects worse or even psychotic, as well as resulting in a significant number of false memories (in Scientology, most involved come up with supposed past life memories of being famous historic characters, including Jesus in a large number of cases, and, because it’s part of their ideology, having been evil galactic overlords who destroyed past civilizations).

      I’d say it’s a toss-up as to whether or not Snyder actually experienced whatever abuse she claimed – rates of false memories seem to run from about 25% to 75% and, in the most directive techniques like past life recovery, 100%*. But NXIVM took her allegations and ran with them, as part of their sort of conspiracy theory to blame others for her problems and eventual disappearance, rather than admit the problems inherent in their techniques and their negligence in handling her case.

      There’s a good, not too long article about the phenomenon of false memories, particularly those generated in supposed therapy sessions, and the controversy over its prevalence, on Wikipedia:

      The production of false memories in such settings has been proven to be real regardless of the questions surrounding its frequency, and whether or not supposed recoveries may in some cases be real probably depends significantly on the skill of the therapist in avoiding suggesting or leading in any way. The NXIVM crew weren’t skilled or professional, so they probably elicted a lot of false material.

      * Despite a few anecdotal stories floating around about children who supposedly recalled past lives that could be verified, all the cases actually lack convincing and verifiable details when scrutinized, and no one has ever for instance been conversant in a foreign language they previously had no exposure to.

  • Excellent!!! This, so far, has been your most comprehensive Q&A to appease some readers and keep your sister’s disappearance relevant. Great job in detailing every nuance.

  • Hi Kim, good to see you hanging in here!

    I know how hard it is to ignore the ignorant and you’re doing a great job of fielding all those second-guessers — who seem to think nothing like what we’ve gone through could ever happen to them bc they’re so superior and would have done it all differently and much better.

    Instead, they should be listening to what you have offered to prepare for when something similar just may happen to them, regardless.

    That’s just the nature of ignorance and, having met you, I know nothing will deter your determination to obtain justice for Kris, regardless! 💖😘

  • There are some commenters who are consistent with the unhelpful remarks and who are trying to to discredit others, often with transparently nonsensical meanness which isn’t worth answering. It seems to me that most who read here regularly recognize the tone of this kind of commentary. In dealing with a group like this, the very subject matter attracts individuals who are still caught up in Nxivm/DOS and who are angry and defensive.

    The same happens at the most active anti-Scientology website, the Underground Bunker, and that website has been active everyday for many years by now. Tony Ortega, the host, rarely blocks anyone but sometimes decides upon that, when it is obvious a “troll” wants attention or to spread misinformation, to issue a threat, etc. Usually the regular readers and commenters bust the troll remarks immediately.

    There could be some active wishes by certain commenters here to keep twisting the circumstances of Kristin’s disappearance, based on motives to keep the truth quiet. From what I can observe, always there have been some Nxivm “loyalists” visiting the Frank Report, and some subjects being covered here push more buttons than others, and that brings out some weird, disorganized hack jobs. There is a bitter unkindness laced through some of the “troll” comments, but that cannot be allowed to stop you, Kim. See it for what it is, because really, it has nothing to do with you or with your heart and mind. I trust you and respect you and am sure that you have been building up strength, not losing any!

    I’m sorry that you have to see this kind of voice here. The world is full of viewpoints, and some here are still caught in Raniere’s insanity, are still devoted to it. So it doesn’t matter what you feel or try to say, these people who are still active or who have stayed stuck in cult mindsets will try to pick at what you have experienced, often knowing nothing about the details. The lack of certainty shows in the contents of these comments, though. So the only object of such comments is to attempt to discredit you, to try to point fingers at you and others who want the truth to be exposed. You might be seeing some of the gaslighting that was being used on Kim, right here, right now. It can be seen for exactly what it is, irrelevant attempts to besmirch your commentary.

    Those questions which were sincere, you answered simply. However, when anyone quibbles with how you or your family responded to Kristin’s disappearance, you can be sure that these individuals have never walked in your shoes.

    The lack of comprehension for shock and for grief is on them, not you. It is the motives of such comments that are questionable, not you. Please be assured that some of us understand and are with you, in heart and mind, for as long as it takes and longer than that as well. Weak argumentativeness is not going to be able to slam any doors shut about what happened to your sister.

    What I want to know, very much, is whether or not any law enforcement agencies are investigating Kristin’s disappearance NOW. So much information has been revealed lately or brought out to light again, while for years the coverups were held in place without much effort, and now everyone in law enforcement ought to be seeing this with fresh eyes. Even in 2002-2003, when Kristin was taking ESP courses out in Alaska, ESP/”Nexium” was already a criminal enterprise, full of deception and lies, lies, lies.

  • Kim:
    You keep up the GREAT work!
    Unfortunately a lot of NXIVM trolls have infected the comments section and they have no hearts and they have no brains and they don’t know when to quit.

    Your love and care and concern for your sister has been evident in every one of your posts.
    Only with the collapse of NXIVM and conviction of Raniere and some of his top Flying Monkeys has the true scope of NXIVM’s evil come out.
    The more I see of this story the more I am convinced that Kristin was drugged and killed.

  • GO KIM! From your cheerleader. Shame people have this tunnel vision, quick to accuse, and can’t comprehend the possibility of a bigger picture

  • Good response to the armchair know it alls, Kim !! Hopefully, your answers to these questions bring us a step closer in finding out the truth.

About the Author

Frank Parlato is an investigative journalist.

His work has been cited in hundreds of news outlets, like The New York Times, The Daily Mail, VICE News, CBS News, Fox News, New York Post, New York Daily News, Oxygen, Rolling Stone, People Magazine, The Sun, The Times of London, CBS Inside Edition, among many others in all five continents.

His work to expose and take down NXIVM is featured in books like “Captive” by Catherine Oxenberg, “Scarred” by Sarah Edmonson, “The Program” by Toni Natalie, and “NXIVM. La Secta Que Sedujo al Poder en México” by Juan Alberto Vasquez.

Parlato has been prominently featured on HBO’s docuseries “The Vow” and was the lead investigator and coordinating producer for Investigation Discovery’s “The Lost Women of NXIVM.” Parlato was also credited in the Starz docuseries "Seduced" for saving 'slave' women from being branded and escaping the sex-slave cult known as DOS.

Additionally, Parlato’s coverage of the group OneTaste, starting in 2018, helped spark an FBI investigation, which led to indictments of two of its leaders in 2023.

Parlato appeared on the Nancy Grace Show, Beyond the Headlines with Gretchen Carlson, Dr. Oz, American Greed, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt, where Parlato conducted the first-ever interview with Keith Raniere after his arrest. This was ironic, as many credit Parlato as one of the primary architects of his arrest and the cratering of the cult he founded.

Parlato is a consulting producer and appears in TNT's The Heiress and the Sex Cult, which premiered on May 22, 2022. Most recently, he consulted and appeared on Tubi's "Branded and Brainwashed: Inside NXIVM," which aired January, 2023.

IMDb — Frank Parlato

Contact Frank with tips or for help.
Phone / Text: (305) 783-7083