About 10 days ago, Jessica Becker said she was not Swami Chetanananda’s victim anymore. He was her guru again.
Jessica lived at the Portland Movement Center and left in the fall of 2019 when the Movement Center closed.
She says she was not invited to Gold Beach because of a drug deal gone bad. She said the Swami asked her to procure some illegal drugs for him, and she came back short several pills.
Jessica Becker at the Movement Center
Because of this, he cut her off from sex with him and tossed her out of the center.
In the interest of fair reporting, I am obligated to report her change of heart.
Jessica was the first person I spoke to about Chetanananda. She called me in the spring of this year and gave me hours of on-the-record interviews.
Jessica Becker at the Portland Movement Center.
She spoke about how Swami Chetanananda was into drugs and BDSM and got aroused by strangling her to unconsciousness.
She spoke about the other women he had BDSM relationships with, and about his fabulous wealth.
The Movement Center, Oregon
At the time, she felt abused by him, since he was the spiritual leader of the community she lived in. She had come there to heal herself of alcohol abuse, and blamed him for plying her with drugs.
She spent much time describing how Swami and her BDSM and binge drug usage could not be a consensual relationship because of the power imbalance.
She sent photos of herself at the ashram. I am including one she asked me to publish. She said she was bruised by the Swami, who had bitten her, as I recall on the thigh (or maybe it was the breast).
She claims it is visible in the photo.
Now Jessica is recanting.
Jessica Becker wrote on September 10:
Hi all. I just wanted to let everyone know – including Ruth – that I have not commented at all on any of the articles since you saw my name.
I stopped all contact and fighting over this issue, because it caused me and others harm.
To be transparent, I ended up using hard drugs for two days straight, after drinking copious amounts of booze while I was involved with this campaign.
I was not coerced into anything I did with Swami Chetanananda.
I am a little too curious of a person, and I suffer from arrogance, which led me to flirt with him on my own, and then get into a consensual sexual relationship with him.
I do not know why I decided to turn on him, or the lineage of this practice that has literally saved my life. This includes Swami Chetanananda. I do not think it matters.
The thing that matters now is to move forward. I do my practice, and listen to those who have percent helped me and have never been wrong with any advice.
I really do not care what he or anyone else thinks of me, but I am forever grateful that he opened the door to a practice that has done so much for me. He is too intense for me sexually, and I feel a bit foolish that I consensually bit off more than I could chew because of my arrogance and curiosity, but that is all.
I do not feel he did anything wrong, and between the risk he took on me and my strength, he actually helped me more than I can say in words.
I wish everyone well. Thanks
And in a comment today, Jessica added:
Just to be clear, I am no longer involved in this campaign. I lied about being a victim of Swamiji’s, because I was enraged that I was uninvited to Gold Beach. This was because of my own actions. I simply would not face it.
I can’t ever make up for the harm I caused from this, but I will make it clear to people that I am not okay with any smear sampling against my spiritual teachers.
I wish everyone well, and I wish everyone a healthy week. Xoxo
In the past, Jessica had a different story.
Back on July 13, she posted a list of law enforcement and counselors for victims of the Swami to contact.
On July 8, Jessica wrote:
I was also one of his flying monkeys [against] Natasha.
Under his spell, I was cruel, and publicly victim-blamed her, shamed her, and even sent an email that said horrid things designed to trigger her.
I want to say how much I regret these things, and I will forever be sorry. The best thing I can do is stand up for women always, and to help in this case, and in others like this.
Cults and high control groups. They are everywhere and have harmed so many people, especially women. While I can’t ever make up for what I did to Natasha, I can do my best from now on.”
On many occasions, she wrote this one-line comment in her name:
“I got out. You can get out. You are not alone.”
Apparently Jessica did not get out. Perhaps she is not alone either. Maybe Chetanananda has let her in at Gold Beach. Perhaps he will allow her to buy drugs for him and strangle her until she passes out and he gets an erection.
Gold Beach Hermitage
Or was she lying about all that?
Maybe. But others said they experienced the same thing.
Still, Chetanananda may emerge victorious. He may escape punishment for the women he seems to have hurt.
He seems to have picked the women well. Picked the kind that won’t fight back. Picked the kind he can intimidate and bully into silence forever.
Most of them are unwilling to speak. Some told me personally they are terrified of him – his black magic; Sharon Ward’s legal acumen.
Now the first person to claim victimhood to me reversed herself, and says the wild sex and drugs were entirely consensual. Even the strangling.
Maybe a little too wild for her tastes, she now realizes, but she invited it. Maybe that’s true of the others.
Just women scorned. Fair enough. Let’s see where it goes from here.