Woman Who Sneaked Away From Raniere After Having Sex With Him Tells Her Story

Violet [not her real name] is an attractive woman who once had an intimate relationship with Keith Alan Raniere.

Here is her story:


By Violet

I met Keith Raniere when I was looking for something in my life and someone to share my life with. While we met for reasons other than romance, he soon let me know he was interested in me romantically.

I was supposed to do some work for him promoting his company.

He did not use any come-on lines. He was direct. He simply said he wanted to have sex with me.

Sex, he said, was nothing to be frightened of; nothing to attach such great importance to. It is just skin touching skin.  Like playing tennis.

I resisted at first.

I always wanted more than just sex with a man. To have sex with a man was not just like playing tennis with him. There was something different, something more – for me at least.  I told him I wanted to be married and have children.

He told me that marriage was indeed possible for us.

And he said that if we did marry, then we would have a child.

I asked him how he knew this.

He said he could foretell the future. He had certain powers and besides – he had been declared the smartest man in the world – based on an IQ test he had taken – and it was not just his word – the Guinness Book of Records noted his brilliance in the category of highest IQ.,

I asked him to tell me more.

He said we would have a female child and she would become an avatar.

Image result for baby krishna avatar
The concept of an avatar is from Hinduism. It is when a manifestation of a deity takes bodily form on earth; an incarnate divine teacher. Krishna [as a baby depicted above] was a Hindu avatar.
I did not know what to make of that.

He pressed. We met and talked and he was quite attentive, but still, I resisted.

If he knew we would have an avatar – a special child – then let us wait for sex and get married.

He sent some women friends of his to meet me. One of them, Pam Cafritz, out of the blue, started to tell me about her relationship with Keith. She explained to me that what Keith had with her and some of the other ‘lucky’ women was not casual sex, but spiritual sex.

It struck me that Pam was bringing this up in order to persuade me to have sex with Keith.  The conversation made me uncomfortable.

Keith Raniere and Pam Cafritz had a special relationship – indeed – Pam was his pimp woman.

Still, we continued to meet.

He looked at me with what I perceived to be such love in his eyes.

One day he said, ‘I worry about you; you are such a pure and innocent soul that you are not meant to be on this earth. There is another, higher world, for someone like you.”

People don’t fall for Keith for no reason. He is smart, charming, funny and playful.

To tell me that I was so pure spiritually – so good – that there was another divine realm that was more suitable for someone like me was an intriguing way to try to seduce a woman.

Still, it seemed like his lifestyle was a million miles away from what I knew would make me happy.

Yet, I have to admit, that when all these other smart people believed in Keith, smart good looking women. it made it more convincing.

Knowing that smart people believed in him made it easier for other people who consider themselves intelligent to ignore red flags.

This was the secret of Keith’s success.

They have a good system to hide his dark side – his other women.

That’s why I don’t fault anybody for believing in him.

Still, his lifestyle would not make me happy. What woman in her right mind wants to be one of many lovers, be part of a harem?

That was not me.

Perhaps it was not any of them.  I think most of the women started out thinking they would be the only one.

At least he was upfront with me. He told me he had many lovers.

But he kept working on me, telling me to be rational, acting like he cared about me in some higher, more evolved way than anyone else ever could.

He and his women – especially Pam – were grooming me in a way that felt like a full-court press, but I didn’t understand the concept of grooming at the time. Sexual predators groom their prey.

One day, Keith drove me over to a house. It was somebody else’s house but he had a key to it. I had never been there before.

We went in and nobody was home. Alone, we sat down on the couch and talked and then we cuddled.

He made me feel special. It was romantic. He was sweet.

One thing led to another. We were two, single, consenting adults. I was in no way a victim.

He told me I would see a blue light after having sex with him and I think it may have been the power of suggestion – but I think I saw it.

And I will admit he was a very capable lover and the sexual experience was exciting and satisfying

‘You will see a blue light’ – Keith Alan Raniere

But right after being intimate with him, before I even had time to relax and enjoy the after moments – he said to me – to my shock, “It is done. Now you can longer be with any other man.”

He tried to claim ownership of me like I was a piece of property.

“Now that we have united, you are bound to never sleep with anyone else again so long as you live. You are mine.”

He gave me a big lecture to explain it. Informing me that I had been initiated into his inner circle.

I was taken aback. I thought at first, “He can’t be serious.”

He was dead serious.

It had the opposite effect that it has reportedly had on other women who joined his harem.

I was completely turned off. I found it deeply manipulative. He did not tell me this in advance.

You can’t just have sex – with a consenting adult – and then after the fact say ‘you’re mine now forever’!

It wasn’t a marriage ceremony. It was perhaps a date – or perhaps casual sex!

And he was not proposing by the way that he would have no other women. It was a one-sided obligation.

I did not actually dispute with him. There was something scary about him now. I remained quiet.

And after he left, I went running back to my more conservative life.

Something told me that if he knew I was not about to commit to him, things might not go well – so I just quietly slipped away and tried to get off his radar.

I moved on with my life.

He has never done anything to harm me, and I’ve never considered him an enemy.

It is my understanding that some people feel enriched by the seminars he created.

However, seeing the harm he has inflicted on other women who have done nothing to deserve it, I thank my lucky stars that I never fell for him or got sucked in.


About the author

Frank Parlato


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  • That really does illustrate the difference between some women. Some are just not guillible and hear a sentence like that – you are now mine forever and thiknk, on your bike mate, that’s a ridiculous unfair deal. Others seem to give in.

  • “He said he could foretell the future. He had certain powers and besides – he had been declared the smartest man in the world”

    Worst pickup line ever.

  • Then I received some more confusing messages from my friend. The woman upstairs, my neighbor, came by while he and the repairman were waiting outside to go in. Danielle would ride up on a bike whenever he went to the condo. This time she was a little late and the neighbor from upstairs started to give them an earful. They’re having sex parties in there, the neighbor told them. https://tinyurl.com/yxggjew8

  • The ladies in my life never mentioned a “blue light”, but all swore they saw fireworks. HAHAHA

    Blue light. WHAT an asshole.(Vangone, that is)

    • What in the world was this blue light supposed to signify? What did Keith claim caused this mysterious light to appear- was it supposed to be a sign from God? Lol
      Here’s an idea, maybe Keith hypnotized them to make them believe they saw the blue light.

  • Hello, pay attention to meeeeeee. “I got AWAY after only one f*ck! But I still like to bring it up for topical discussion, all of these years later, like Bob Hope singing ‘Thanks for the Memories.'”

    The Violet woman ( or is that beet red?) who schtupped Raniere did not fall for him but only had a wham, bam, thank the (her words) “very capable lover,” with the myopic Flabturd himself. The one and only! Can you even begin to dig it? Ugh a bugga boo. Raniere, the obvious harem vomitus, who is described herein as having been an “exciting” and “satisfying” what? 10 or so minutes of friction? Yawn. Blergh. This sounds like the rehash of a contradictory-feeling egotrip about having sex one time with some foul jackass whose name has been in print. He even came highly recommended by his coven of tricky, jealous saleswomen, like a rusty-bottomed used car with rolled-back low mileage. Desirability only to be matched by the offal redolence of a putrid can of sardines which some anorexic hid in her lingerie drawer to eat later, when alone at last.

    Hey! “One time, at band camp, I got screwed, quite voluntarily, by a famous criminal! Woobie woobie for me! Now lemme explain how it went and how come it was so gosh darn exciting, as well as psychologically educational.”

    Let’s get real. The lady let herself get suckered as fresh meat amongst the meat Raniere was already used to banging, a bunch of unattractive, possessed hags who had already surrendered and were eager to supply their Guru of Grotesqueness with fresh, unsampled ass. Maybe the ass would come with a trust fund or somethin’. Maybe she could clean toilets for some more sex with the Guru of Grub, if found worthy to join the Groupie Troop.

    Let us all list, describe and discuss all of the boring or rather strange or very hairy or God forbid! PAUNCHY and /or psychopathic losers with whom we couldn’t resist having one-night stands. Who wants to get the ball rolling!? Maybe it is a slow news day and there is a Guinness World Record waiting to be broken. Y’all get to go first, since it was my idea. Hahaha.

    The lady, Violet-but-not-wanting-to-be-Beet Red, was aware that sex was like tennis to the sweaty greaseball and that he had other sexual partners pressuring her, all pimplike, to let him have at her. So what the hell was the big attraction? “Let me visit him one more time and see if I can restrain myself.” ??? For crying out loud, this is a dime novel soufflé, a whipped-up and easily splatt-able scrap of aged, sooty, turgid air.

    Beet-Red says that she wanted the “white picket fence” dream all along and wasn’t interested in being with a manwhore with herpes, horns and a spiked red tail, but the pressure was too great to resist. Get out of town. Also, so what? Tons of people have screwed around with “mistaken identities” every once in awhile, let it go, live it down and sigh with relief as the recollections pass. Better luck next time and maybe remember to have better taste in lovers or even in wham-bams. Is this little vignette any different, or is it only different because the lady still finds her sexual try-out session worth mentioning? What a f*cked up epiphany.

  • That’s funny, I heard a very similar story in 2011 except the “groomer” described was Nancy Salzman not Pam Caffritz.

    I met this other attractive woman — who also saw the blue light — with Barbara Bouchey in LA during the Precision trial.

    She went on about how it was NANCY SALZMAN who humiliated and cajoled her, demanding she get on the next plane to Albany to let Keith save her soul through sex, how Nancy scolded her saying things like, “don’t give me that poo-poo mouth” when she demurred.

    But “Violet” couldn’t be the same blue light special lady I met with Barb, surely, bc Nancy Salzman isn’t mentioned here in “Violet’s” story at all.

    Nor did Barb’s friend note anything good about NXIVM in 2011 as does “Violet” now.

    Gee, I know, maybe Barb and “Violet” could hook up with Nancy Salzman to repackage NXIVM — source and sell the secret of the blue light — without pesky Pam and nasty Keith around to ruin everything.

    • Ok, I must ask– under what circumstances would one woman share the “blue light” story to a complete stranger. Do tell.

      • At a lunch break during the Precision trial. My first thought was that Keith &/or Nancy slipped her a mickey. MDMA or ecstasy can affect the optic nerve and users report seeing a blue light.

        However, like “Violet” here, Barb’s friend also offered the “power of suggestion” to explain the blue light special back in 2011 — but, again, she attributed much more persuasiveness to Nancy Salzman than “Violet” does.

  • … Note that tennis is a sport where there is no touching each other, except perhaps the handshake at the end.

    I’ve stated repeatedly that Raniere’s small orbit of evil women are what made him “successful” in what he accomplished, and here’s more proof of that.

    “What woman in her right mind wants to be one of many lovers, be part of a harem?” Apparently, all Muslim women, unless you consider all Muslim women to be out of their minds.

    I wonder how many women had a similar with Raniere? He definitely had a “NEXT!” Amway salesmanship attitude with “Violet,” if they don’t agree to join under Raniere’s terms, just move onto the next prospect.

  • You explained succinctly how groomers ply their trade and how they can be enabled by others who help him to groom.
    Slick, aren’t they?

  • I believe this is online already. And she is married now, so that must be why she is anonymous.

    Wonder how hubby feels. Must be taking it better than I would.

    In all honesty, KR is such a flaming asshole.

    But hey–this one fell for it, too.

  • i thought Keith did not know how to drive. How did he drive this woman to the house where they had sex?
    Is this real?

    Could you provide more insight into what Pam did? I find her grooming very interesting.
    Great article, Frank

      • It wasn’t safe for Keith to drive. They’re lucky they didn’t get into an accident. Keith driving was a nightmare – stoplights would malfunction, police radar detectors would go crazy, self-driving cars swerved to get out of his way, rain clouds were forced to alter direction, animals froze in the road staring at a blue light. It was a mess.

About the Author

Frank Parlato is an investigative journalist.

His work has been cited in hundreds of news outlets, like The New York Times, The Daily Mail, VICE News, CBS News, Fox News, New York Post, New York Daily News, Oxygen, Rolling Stone, People Magazine, The Sun, The Times of London, CBS Inside Edition, among many others in all five continents.

His work to expose and take down NXIVM is featured in books like “Captive” by Catherine Oxenberg, “Scarred” by Sarah Edmonson, “The Program” by Toni Natalie, and “NXIVM. La Secta Que Sedujo al Poder en México” by Juan Alberto Vasquez.

Parlato has been prominently featured on HBO’s docuseries “The Vow” and was the lead investigator and coordinating producer for Investigation Discovery’s “The Lost Women of NXIVM.” In addition, he was credited in the Starz docuseries 'Seduced' for saving 'slave' women from being branded and escaping the sex-slave cult known as DOS.

Parlato appeared on the Nancy Grace Show, Beyond the Headlines with Gretchen Carlson, Dr. Oz, American Greed, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt, where Parlato conducted the first-ever interview with Keith Raniere after his arrest. This was ironic, as many credit Parlato as one of the primary architects of his arrest and the cratering of the cult he founded.

Parlato is a consulting producer and appears in TNT's The Heiress and the Sex Cult, which premieres on May 22, 2022.

IMDb — Frank Parlato


Contact Frank with tips or for help.
Phone / Text: (305) 783-7083
Email: frankparlato@gmail.com