Keith Richards, Kenny Rogers, Kimmi Raikkonen? Keep DOS Alive With New Guru With Keith Raniere’s Initials

Keith Richards - at least he has the same first name.

With Nxivm leader Keith Raniere in federal custody and likely to be sentenced to life in prison, his DOS slaves will need a new master. One of the problems, as pointed out by Pyriel in this guest view, is that the pubic brand on the slaves are Raniere’s initials -K-R. Would it be possible for the slave women to find another guru with the same initials? 

Guest View by Pyriel

It may be hard to find a new guru as charming as Keith Raniere but he is currently unavailable.

While commenting on the current DOS situation, Shivani said, “Right now some of Raniere’s first wives and future widows club could be scouring the bowels of Brooklyn and Albany looking for a new Keith.”

I also had been pondering that absent Guru problem and the brand that will forever adorn their pubic area.

The pubic brand with Keith Raniere’s initials

Find the Right Man With the Right Initials

The solution to the problem is to replace their Vanguard with another leader with the same initials.

Kimi Raikkonen

Kimi Raikkonen, an Option?

The first option would be to adopt the Finnish Formula One racing driver, Kimi Raikkonen as their new leader. Kimi is also famous for his pearls of wisdom including “For sure, sometimes I don’t know what I’m doing.”

This seems to be the current DOS situation.

There is another quote from Kimi that Nicki Clyne and Co. could aspire to: “Be yourself. If you try to be someone else, it won’t work. Whatever you do, you are not going to make everyone happy.”

Would Nicki Clyne be willing to text anyone other than Keith Alan Raniere ‘Ready Master”?

Kimi, of course, travels a lot so it would be expensive to follow him. He’s also married and I doubt that his wife would be willing to share him. The good news for Kimi is that he can drive fast when he sees trouble heading his way.

Kenny Rogers, An Older Guru Is Indicated

Perhaps he would be too young for a group of slaves who have grown accustomed to an older Guru.

The second, more mature option would be to choose the well known country singer Kenny Rogers.


Kenny Rogers has good advice for slaves via the lyrics of his songs.

His lines include “Stay away from trouble if you can.” and “You gotta know when to hold ’em, know when to fold’ em, know when to walk away, know when to run.”

Always good advice when someone asks you to give them collateral which can then be used as blackmail material. Kenny is also married and has two sons so I doubt that he, or his family would be willing to entertain a group of DOS slaves, although he probably won’t mind them singing his songs.

Keith Richards Might Work

The third option for new leader is someone who has been there, seen that and got the tee-shirt. He’s also an older man and it’s doubtful that he’d be shocked by a group of DOS slaves stripping off in front of him. He wouldn’t need Viagra either.

I give you Keith Richards, who could possibly be immortal as it seems that endless amounts of drugs, alcohol and women couldn’t kill him. Nicki and pals did have Sympathy For The Devil once, and Time Is On their Side, after all, so why not choose a legend?

Keef’s pearls of wisdom are too numerous to mention. He is also married and I’m pretty sure that his wife has put up with a lot. Who knows what she would think if a bunch of DOS slaves offered to worship her husband and become sister wives?

And if the answer’s no?

“You can’t always get what you want

You can’t always get what you want

You can’t always get what you want

But if you try sometime you might find

You get what you need.


Image result for keith richards

“If you’re going to kick authority in the teeth, you might as well use two feet.” – a line from Keith Richards’ memoir, Life in 2010. Advice that perhaps Keith Raniere might have profited from of he had had feet as opposed to paws.

Rare photo of Keith Raniere’s almost perfectly square paws.



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  • How about the already skinny Kelly Ripa? Oh, never mind. I guess she’s not man enough for the job.

    • Nah. Kelly Ripa seems smart. She’s wealthy as she’s had the same high paying job for several years and likely has it as long as she wants, and seems very family oriented. I believe she’s 48 and she married the love of her life young wasting no time and she has three kids now ages 22, 18 and 16 I believe.

  • I know this story will get a rise out of Nicki Clyne or one of her alter egos so I am compelled to ask this question.

    A few days ago the Frank Report told the story about how Allison Mack is a connoisseur of beautiful pussies.
    And Allison was tasking pictures of female genitalia when she looked at a picture of Michelle Hatchette’s private parts and commented,
    ‘Beautiful cunt.’

    Here is the testimony:
    Michelle Hatchette was admired by Allison Mack

    A Well, she said something when Michele went.

    Q What did she say when Michele went?

    A She said — … she looked at the photo and just kind of said, ‘Beautiful cunt.’ And I was just like, ‘God, what?’ I just was grossed out. And, yeah, and I just waited for my turn and I was, like, really angry. Really angry.

    Part 3: Gems From Trial: Allison Mack Tells Nude Slave She Has ‘Beautiful Cunt’

    So Nicki, now that you are room mates with Michelle is Allison right?
    Does Michelle have a beautiful pussy?
    Maybe that’s why people say, “Once you go black you don’t go back.”

    • Nice one Snorlax! Recently the internet exploded over Keanu because apparently he has become the “master” of NOT touching fans for photos, but placing his arms near fans to make it appear that he has an arm wrapped around their shoulder etc. Soooo perhaps not a suitable replacement because he doesnt want anyone to touch him or vice versa.

    • Snorlax- How did I forget Keanu Reeves?
      Keanu is apparently privately very spiritual” and he obviously has a better view of women than Vangone ever did as one of his quotes is “It’s always wonderful to get to know women, with the mystery and the joy and the depth. If you can make a woman laugh, you’re seeing the most beautiful thing on God’s Earth.”

      I don’t think Keanu is currently attached and although he isn’t too adept at fighting off vampires (Bram Stoker’s Dracula), he’s not too bad with demons (Constantine). He should be able to handle a DOS slave pod.

      Can Keanu free their minds and unplug them from the NXIVM Matrix?

      Could Keanu be “The One?”

      • I also realised that I left out Kurt Russell. As Snake Plissken, he was the greatest guy to ever wear an eyepatch and he rejected the new authoritarian USA, even turning the power off globally when pissed off too much.He escaped from New York and LA, unlike Vangone who ain’t escaping MDC.
        Kurt’s long term partner is Goldie Hawn who went through bootcamp in Private Benjamin. She can be a badass when pushed. She’s probably more badass than Nicki and her pod.

    • Shadow – Against all odds, Keef is still alive.
      On 27 April 2006, while in Fiji, Richards slipped off the branch of a dead tree (later to be reported by the international press as a coconut tree) and suffered a head injury. He subsequently underwent cranial surgery at a New Zealand hospital.[80] The incident delayed the Rolling Stones’ 2006 European tour for six weeks and forced the band to reschedule several shows. The revised tour schedule included a brief statement from Richards apologising for “falling off my perch”.[81] The band made up most of the postponed dates in 2006, and toured Europe in 2007 to make up the remainder. In a video message in late 2013 as part of the On Fire tour, Richards gave his thanks to the surgeons in New Zealand who treated him, remarking, “I left half my brain there.”
      Maybe Keef could learn how not to fall out of trees from Nicki.

About the Author

Frank Parlato is an investigative journalist.

His work has been cited in hundreds of news outlets, like The New York Times, The Daily Mail, VICE News, CBS News, Fox News, New York Post, New York Daily News, Oxygen, Rolling Stone, People Magazine, The Sun, The Times of London, CBS Inside Edition, among many others in all five continents.

His work to expose and take down NXIVM is featured in books like “Captive” by Catherine Oxenberg, “Scarred” by Sarah Edmonson, “The Program” by Toni Natalie, and “NXIVM. La Secta Que Sedujo al Poder en México” by Juan Alberto Vasquez.

Parlato has been prominently featured on HBO’s docuseries “The Vow” and was the lead investigator and coordinating producer for Investigation Discovery’s “The Lost Women of NXIVM.” In addition, he was credited in the Starz docuseries 'Seduced' for saving 'slave' women from being branded and escaping the sex-slave cult known as DOS.

Parlato appeared on the Nancy Grace Show, Beyond the Headlines with Gretchen Carlson, Dr. Oz, American Greed, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt, where Parlato conducted the first-ever interview with Keith Raniere after his arrest. This was ironic, as many credit Parlato as one of the primary architects of his arrest and the cratering of the cult he founded.

Parlato is a consulting producer and appears in TNT's The Heiress and the Sex Cult, which premieres on May 22, 2022.

IMDb — Frank Parlato,_Jr.

Contact Frank with tips or for help.
Phone / Text: (305) 783-7083