Harem Women #1: Notes on the harem life

People are leaving NXIVM. Some are publicly leaving. Some are leaving quietly, secretly. The following post and two others to follow are from notes I took from three harem woman who left or will soon be leaving. To protect their identities and for congruity, I made minor edits but changed nothing of the meaning. Harem Woman #1 made these remarks to Frank Report during V-Week.

By A Harem Woman Never in DOS

sdfghA lot of people want to leave NXIVM. Some are on the payroll. How do they get another job? They have no resume. Who are they going to ask for a letter of reference? Keith? Nancy? If you leave, you have to start at the bottom. But what’s the difference? No one makes any money at NXIVM anyway.

The training keep everyone poor. Do you know any business model that requires employees to pay for training? And requires you to go back to school and pay $5,000 per month?  Usually you get a job, they pay for your training. I know no business model where they push and push you to take more training and make you pay for it.

Clare Bronfman

Clare Bronfman

In NXIVM, you have to be nice to Clare [Bronfman]. You are NOT allowed not to be her friend. If anyone criticizes Clare or Sara Bronfman, they are punished. The Bronfmans have an issue that people only like them for their money.

But would anybody in NXIVM be their friends if they were not spending all this money? Especially Keith.

Who would be Clare’s friend? It is easy to be nice to Sara, she is nice. Clare is not nice.  Clare is all wrapped up and starry eyed over Keith. But she doesn’t like people.

Clare was once not so skinny.

When she first came in, she had a beautiful figure. She was athletic and muscular. Looks aren’t everything, but in NXIVM, they are. She was never attractive. Look how thin she is now. But there is no weight gain or loss that an ugly person can make to make herself look better. She does not struggle with her weight like the rest do.  When she makes a decision, it is black and white. She gets to feel beautiful because she has the desired thinness.



Being Thin


Being that thin is not healthy. There are medical reports on what it does to a woman’s body.  Low calorie diets keep women weak and mentally deficient.

I think Keith makes women stay thin because he is attracted to thin women. He gets the side benefit of when you’re starving and sleep deprived, you are malleable.

Pam Cafritz was on a low cal diet and lots of running.

Pam died. Kidney cancer is uncommon. I think the stress may have caught up to her. It may catch up to others. The women do not go to the doctor often. They do not have health insurance. With Pam, I think they made the diagnosis late. With Barb Jeske, there was a personality shift. It happened quickly. Who knows how many are ill now?

Some of the women on the diet who stop having their period may not be in menopause. They may not be getting their periods because of stress. Some of them can get their periods back, when the stress is gone. If they gain their weight back, their stress might go away and they might start getting them again. It depends on how old they are. People like India, who is 27, or Allison, who is 35, they have a pretty good chance at getting their periods again, if they start eating.

Keith as an athlete

Keith Raniere appears to have lost muscle.

Keith is not on any low cal diet. He was never ripped, but he used to have big shoulders and big legs. He’s lost a lot of muscle. He is not in shape. He lost his athletic prowess.

I never saw him do judo. I heard he did it when he was 12. That was 45 years ago. I saw a picture of him with an award once as I recall. I think he won against 12 year-old’s. It might have been wrestling. He certainly did not defeat adults. He is very misleading on a lot of things. When he went to RPI, he had ‘c’ and ‘d’ grades. He only has a bachelor’s degree. He is not this great scientist or scholar.

Keith as a sociopath

I think Keith tries to hurt people deliberately.  He’s having fun. He is not trying to hide it. He’s the Wizard of Clifton Park. But he is not a wizard behind the curtain. He has the curtains drawn and is doing it openly and laughing at us while he is doing it.

We are like toys to him. The women are expendable. He might enjoy people. He doesn’t love them. He is a classic sociopath. He can have fun with people and enjoy their company but I don’t think he cares about them.

He does things because it is entertaining.

As for his baby., that is sad. That child is going to be broken. If he molests that little boy, somebody might actually do something about it.

Everyone knows they were lied to about Gaelyn. They were told they were lied to protect them. All of the women closest to Keith knew then. Keith told various women they would have his child. Pam, Barbara, Lauren, Ivy.  Some of the women said “I have an issue. I am so bad. I feel jealousy over this Buddha child. I should go EM myself.”

laren u
Karen Unterreiner’s weight has gone up.

Ivy was told the baby was adopted. Ivy is trapped. She is smart. She had a good sense of humor. She yo-yos with her weight depending on how she was treated. She got plump. She goes up and down. Karen goes up and down too. Now she is fat. She has given up.  I really doubt Keith wants to have sex with her and why bother to get thin if he’s not going to have sex with you?






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Frank Parlato

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6 years ago

News flash, honey. You gals are already at rock bottom. There is nowhere to go from Hell except up.

6 years ago

In terms of people leaving….. a word of caution…

Over time, a number of the people leaving NXIVM aka (the infidel/suppressives/the evil ones/the destructive ones/the lost souls) have received texts and calls from people on the inside. On rare occasions, it’s to gather information because those inside are themselves full of doubts and know something’s terribly wrong but they can’t put their finger on it. That’s about 10-20% of the time. So what about the other 80-90%? Those are sent by the Gestapo, pretending to be your friends. They say things like:

* “I’m really concerned about you.”
* “I have some feedback on your process”
* “As your friend, I want to share some things that might help”
* “I’m really concerned about so and so.”
* “Is there any way I can help?”
* “Can’t we resolve what’s got you upset?”
* “I just want to help……”
* “Perhaps if we could just have a chat?”
* “Let’s examine the values conflict.”
* “This is damage you’ll never be able to heal in this lifetime…”

If you decide to engage in the conversation, somewhere along the line you may suddenly find yourself under a sneaky psychological ‘attack’. The reason is because an operative can’t truly allow themselves to doubt or question. At some point they bump into their own fear boundary which manifests as unquestioning fanaticism. How do you respond?

The WRONG thing to do is try to reason with them. (That will turn into a cluster-fuck of illogical stupidity) It’s like talking to a devout believer. You’re saying things like… “look this action is destructive” and they are saying the equivalent of…. “Have you stood naked in the light before our Lord and Savior and have you really looked at your issues?”….

You’re not going to get anywhere…. The right thing to do is HANG UP and know that everything you said went directly to the GESTAPO. Yup. Within 1 minute, the GESTAPO has a recording or screenshot of the whole interaction.

Here are some tell tale signs to help you uncover the wolf in sheeps clothing that’s come to ‘help’ you:

* They start the conversation sweetly, evenly and warmly… then it becomes intellectually violent. Blatantly obvious double-binds, using your values against you, veiled threats. (See, they don’t really want to help you. They want to prove you wrong and do some good old fashioned smiting)
* They begin using word-salad on you (look it up)
* They tell you, “you are being extremely destructive”… while refusing to acknowledge anything you are saying as valid or even existing (GASLIGHTING – look it up) This has happened countless times when people bring up DOS.
* They want you to give them evidence, proof, or ‘data’ of the thing you are concerned about. They want to pinpoint exactly where the ‘complaint’ came from so they can ‘help’ (aka – go and suppress evidence asap)
* They want you to give them names of people that have shared their evidence or experience… do you wonder why? Perhaps so they can litigate the fuck out of them or try get them thrown in prison?

So what’s going on with these colluders?
They are on a mission, which fills them with a kind of pious fervor. They can’t see that they are being violent. They’ve compartmentalized what they are doing as necessary. They can’t even understand it’s an ‘end justifies the means’ approach. Also… they are terrified. If they question ONE thing related to what you are saying the WHOLE damn thing might unravel. Then they have to question EVERYTHING. That’s scary…

But here’s the worst part….

Let’s say that the Gestapo want you destroyed. Be it by legal or illegal means. They have an army of well-meaning drones who are sent to deal with you. They often choose people that you had a strong connection and ‘rapport’ with, people you cared about, people who had control over you. This colluder that’s sent in, has no idea they are working for the Gestapo. They can’t fathom the possibility that what they extract out of you, and report back…. could end your life. (Especially if you live in Mexico) They are stupidly, innocently… malevolent towards you. Also – they are not told the whole story. They are just given a compartmentalized mission. So you are now dealing with someone you probably care about, who is working for the Gestapo, that cannot understand why you are so cautious (because you’ve seen what they are really capable of) who’s insisting you lower your guard… and tries to use your issues against you.

They are in a TRANCE. If they leave and they snap out of the trance, they are often horrified at what they have participated in. I’ve seen it happen time and time again.

While they can’t ‘try you on’, you can try them on. You were once like that.
You once believed that anyone who left must have psychological problems and is deeply misguided and has become suppressive.
You couldn’t fathom how anybody could have grave concerns as that would question the authority of the leadership (which trips the ‘speaking dishonorably’ trap).
You were convinced (because you’ve been fed the story) that there is a massive conspiracy/slander attack against ESP that is funded at the highest levels of government and world cabals.
You were told these people must’ve fallen into the cabals hands.
You believed you had the way, and they were lost.
You believed that punishment was necessary except you called it ‘holding them accountable’.
You believed all those things.

But just because you may understand them, do not be fooled. They still work for the Gestapo. They want to take you down… unless you repent. They are fanatics of an organized religion… but do not realize it. This is not about ethics, it is about control. If you ‘buy in’ to their ‘sweet’ tactics, they will destroy everything you love. Freedom of mind and all the goodness which comes from that.


About the Author

Frank Parlato is an investigative journalist.

His work has been cited in hundreds of news outlets, like The New York Times, The Daily Mail, VICE News, CBS News, Fox News, New York Post, New York Daily News, Oxygen, Rolling Stone, People Magazine, The Sun, The Times of London, CBS Inside Edition, among many others in all five continents.

His work to expose and take down NXIVM is featured in books like “Captive” by Catherine Oxenberg, “Scarred” by Sarah Edmonson, “The Program” by Toni Natalie, and “NXIVM. La Secta Que Sedujo al Poder en México” by Juan Alberto Vasquez.

Parlato has been prominently featured on HBO’s docuseries “The Vow” and was the lead investigator and coordinating producer for Investigation Discovery’s “The Lost Women of NXIVM.” Parlato was also credited in the Starz docuseries "Seduced" for saving 'slave' women from being branded and escaping the sex-slave cult known as DOS.

Additionally, Parlato’s coverage of the group OneTaste, starting in 2018, helped spark an FBI investigation, which led to indictments of two of its leaders in 2023.

Parlato appeared on the Nancy Grace Show, Beyond the Headlines with Gretchen Carlson, Dr. Oz, American Greed, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt, where Parlato conducted the first-ever interview with Keith Raniere after his arrest. This was ironic, as many credit Parlato as one of the primary architects of his arrest and the cratering of the cult he founded.

Parlato is a consulting producer and appears in TNT's The Heiress and the Sex Cult, which premiered on May 22, 2022. Most recently, he consulted and appeared on Tubi's "Branded and Brainwashed: Inside NXIVM," which aired January, 2023.

IMDb — Frank Parlato

Contact Frank with tips or for help.
Phone / Text: (305) 783-7083
Email: frankreport76@gmail.com


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