Breaking through to alienated kids
In Part 1, Koth-Zanard discusses how parental alienation affects children’s psychological and emotional development.
In Part 2, focuses on strategies for breaking through to alienated kids “to help them overcome the effects of this insidious manipulation.”
Kloth-Zanard’s work is mostly with fathers whose children do not want to see them, and who claim the mother alienated the children from them.
Since family court is a money-making enterprise for the people who control it — attorneys – it is not a system to trust your children in or to seek justice. It is not a system capable of distinguishing between true and false claims of alienation, though it is a system quite capable of distinguishing how much money can be extracted from a divorce and custody case.
Below Kloth-Zanard discusses her webinar.
By Joan T. Kloth-Zanard
Parental alienation is a form of psychological abuse in which your ex encourages your kids to break your heart. It’s terrible for you, but even worse for your children.
Parental alienation interferes with your children’s brain development, emotional growth, and executive functioning.
Yes, you love your kids and want a relationship with them. But there’s another important reason for breaking through to alienated kids: Parental alienation inhibits your children’s ability to mature into healthy, happy and productive members of society.
Key steps include building their self-esteem and teaching them critical thinking. When your kids can trust their own perceptions, they may realize they want you in their lives after all.
After this course, you should:
- Understand what the alienated child experiences
- Recognize the effects of psychological child abuse
- Describe how alienation affects a child’s executive functioning
- Boost kids’ self-esteem to help them resist alienation
- Respond appropriately to negative behavior by your kids
- Collaborate with your kids to solve problems
Part 1 – Understanding how parental alienation affects children
- Parental Alienation — what it is
- Alternate terms for parental alienation
- Parental alienation is terrorism
- DSM 5 diagnoses for the alienated child
- What the alienated child experiences
- Lack of emotional and mental maturity
- Effects of psychological child abuse
- Children’s self-worth and self-esteem
- Behaviors of the targeted parent
- Behaviors of the alienator
- Psychological abuse and actions that an alienator may use
- Other victims of parental alienation
- Children and resiliency
- A child’s brain development
- 11 Executive functioning skills and how alienation affects them
- Treatment of parental alienation
- Is your counselor helping or hurting?
- The goal of intervention
- What happens in reunification/reintegration therapy?
Part 2 — Strategies for supporting your kids day to day
- First and foremost, take care of yourself
- Happy, healthy, successful and spiritually positive
- The importance of unconditional love for your children
- Why alienated children are afraid to love you and how to help them
- Alienation seems to stunt children’s emotional growth
- How to help children make progress in emotional maturity
- Helping kids understand the impact of their own behavior
- Boosting kids’ self-esteem helps them resist alienation
- How teenagers are affected by parental alienation
- Splitting — why kids feel they need to be different with each parent
- How to react when your child repeats your ex’s smears
- Use empathy questions when your child makes false accusations
- What to do when:
- Your ex is berating you in front of the children
- Your children refuse to visit you
- Your children are lying to you
- Your child says, “I hate you”
- Your children are taking their fear and anger out on you
- Your children say they don’t have to listen to you
- Your children claim abuse that hasn’t happened
- Your children say they are afraid of you
- Your child has gender identity issues
- Your child becomes physically violent and attacks you
- How alienated children are like explosive children
- A collaborative problem-solving approach with your kids