Shivani: Why Does Kristin Snyder’s Alleged Suicide Note Fail to Mention Her Pregnancy – Which Was Foremost on Her Mind?

MK10ART's painting of Kristin Snyder kayaking

The following comes from comments from Shivani and she raises some very good points. Perhaps foremost is that Kristin Snyder was constantly stating that Keith Raniere had gotten her pregnant. So why did she not mention it in her suicide note, if she really wrote it? Other points made are quite persuasive. Did Kristin Snyder write only the first sentence of the note and it was finished by someone else?

By Shivani

Maybe the suicide note was intended to depict Kristin Snyder as mentally ill and, thus, possibly suicidal, “rotting in her interior organs” as an attempted expression of a “breakdown” and of a malfunctioning mentality.

That could have been both the motive and the design, to offer evidence that Kristin was mentally ill.

By my assessment, the note contained exaggerated wording and actually shows a lack of comprehension about the distinctions between a “nervous breakdown” versus a psychotic break.

I do not buy that Kristin had gone off the deep end so severely as to have had a genuine psychotic break, which manifests more extremely.

The “suicide” note attempts to describe psychosis and not the lesser symptoms of an emotional or nervous breakdown.

This suicide note could have been written by a beginning psychology student, without personal or practical experience.

The writer was indicating Kristin was psychotic. This could have been written to AVOID any mention of the reality of Kristin being repeatedly gaslighted by the staff and what Kristin was really saying. No ESP staff would want to admit any of that.

So make it look like something completely different: psychosis. In addition, Kristin could have been drugged, sedated.

For that to be hidden too, one could point out psychosis as a blanket excuse for dissembling about someone’s erratic behavior.

As for there being a body to be found, as one can see, the truck, note(s) and kayak, etc., were made into the focal point of the investigation. Yet, none of that shows any proof that Kristin was ever at Miller’s Landing. ([Name Redacted] l had a cabin right next door to Miller’s Landing, though. And [Name Redacted] attended the Anchorage intensive.)

These Resurrection Bay elements could have been put together as a distraction, as deceptive misinformation.

We know that ESP staff and Nancy Salzman not only lied by omission, covering up Kristin’s experience with Raniere and her possible resultant pregnancy, but that Nancy told a deliberate lie later on about the suicide note.

Another thing we know is that [Name Redacted] was rewarded by Nancy Salzman not long after Kristin Snyder vanished. [Name Redacted] moved cross-country, was given new work by Salzman and a place to live, all of that on top of what? – $50,000 “mad money.”

If [Name Redacted]  left the group, what do you suppose would be stopping her from talking now? How about all of those material rewards and how they indicate she was bribed, bought off?

What Nancy Salzman did was to use her neural-linguistic background training while testifying under an oath which probably means zero to her, to try to disprove that Kristin would have known the term “Nexium” and to call the “suicide” note questionable, as if someone, some fictional character, had changed or later fabricated the note.

There is nothing to trust from Nancy Salzman, who is corrupt and knows it. From researching some of her past, prior to her hooking up with Raniere, Salzman succeeded at misrepresenting her educational background and qualifications.

What I have kept seeing about Kristin’s disappearance are setups, lies of omission and the use of misdirection.

I think Kristin’s body was disposed of nowhere near Resurrection Bay. Kristin never drove there at all. Someone shorter than Kristin appears to have driven her truck and parked it, according to Kristin’s sister, who knows Kristin’s height. {[Name Redacted] is about 5’2″]

If Kristin Snyder were being drugged, it probably would have affected her penmanship, even drastically, especially if she was given more than one “typical” dose or amount.

If she had been drugged and then wrote, her writing would reflect that drugged state considerably more than what is showing.

It does look to me that she was drugged under the Anchorage command of Esther Carlson Chiappone, who took her orders from Nancy Salzman, who was ruling the Anchorage ESP staff and directing procedures to protect Raniere.

However, Kristin was most likely to have been dosed to quiet her, to shut her down, not to have had her compose some “suicide” note which carefully censored what Kristin was saying about Raniere about rape and pregnancy.

I think someone wanted the note to be legible and was trying to copy her handwriting but not altogether successfully.

To me it looks like the one writing it, pretending to be Kristin, began her inclusions with the note’s second paragraph, sometime after Kristin wrote the first sentence, to start what she never finished, at the top of a page. The subsequent writing is too neatly printed and didn’t attempt to replicate Kristin’s cursive script. The slant used by Kristin is absent. The contents of the note do not address what Kristin had kept saying.

As I kept looking at the first page, it became increasingly more striking to me that Kristin might have only written the first sentence and the rest was added by another hand.

It doesn’t seem likely that her slant would’ve transformed from a forward slant into one that is straight up and down.

Changing the slant of writing, even on purpose, takes practice, to make that slant change become consistent.

The suicide note does not even try to reflect Kristin’s own natural slant. I think it was not done well!

Although the change of manner between the first sentence and the rest of the contents is marked, with the first sentence being neutral, what shows as self-expression after that first sentence veers into a completely different “voice” to me.

That writer’s voice is detailing a perception of internal disorganization and symptoms of paranoia, feelings of helplessness with the notable, emphasized accompaniment of descriptive organic sensations of “disintegration.”

Raniere preached about disintegration, using this as a method of entrapping others into the parameters of his controlling mechanisms, couched in dogma.

His minions imitated him and were sold on his dogma. They were willing and happy to focus upon disintegration as a means of separating and isolating others, of calling those who were “disintegrating” as being in need of waking up and seeing things as Raniere wanted them to see.

The writer’s voice, in the second paragraph, launches into a validation of Raniere’s bullshit by showing “the voice of Kristin” as disintegrated.

I see the change of viewpoint being demonstrated in the note’s contents as a change of WHO was composing the note. The motive of the note switches immediately after the first sentence.

The note might make sense if that had been how Kristin was behaving. However, Kristin was seen as being disruptive, and not because of paranoia or freaked-out bodily sensations of deadness or numbness.

Instead, Kristin was talking about having been raped and drugged by Raniere and about being impregnated. This content is completely absent from her so-called suicide note, yet she was known to have kept talking about this during the intensive.

She said Raniere had sex with her. She was devastated, she was in considerable emotional pain because of him and unhappy about this.

In fact, she couldn’t be stopped from addressing it repeatedly. This was her major concern. She was removed from the group at least three times for bringing up her sexual experience with Raniere.

This was why she kept being pulled out of the intensive.

Yet, none of this is mentioned in what is supposed to be her suicide note(s.) So who was concealing this? Kristin, who would not quit addressing it? I hardly think so.

I cannot prove it. It’s theoretical. So too it is theoretical to posit that Kristin wrote these contents of psychological disconnection and put herself into Resurrection Bay.

Remember the overall context of what and who Kristin was encountering. She was an innocent facing a criminal organization of lying hucksters who were adamant about denying what she had to say.

So again, I think Kristin wrote only the first sentence of this 2-page note and that a nasty conspirator who was involved in gaslighting Kristin and, ultimately, making her disappear wrote the rest.

Despair or frustration or even contending with fear or heartbreak usually does not lead to or end in insanity.  Kristin seemed like a strong and hearty individual. Certainly, she was offered no support to even begin to accept her experiences.

Kristin was defrauded. She was cheated.

These group leaders acted as tyrants, and it was their way or the highway, and Kristin had to get LOST. She was not helped. She was being denied any help at all. One way or another Kristin was deliberately destroyed.

I do not think she killed herself or that she went insane.


About the author

Guest View


Click here to post a comment

Please leave a comment: Your opinion is important to us! (Email & username are optional. To leave a name, click on the email icon)

  • Who writes ‘if you find me or this note’ in a suicide note, and then writes ‘no need to search for my body’?

    That seems to contradict itself, and doesnt make much sense if she were truly not planning to be found.

    I agree, the note appears to have been written in two parts – the first sentence in cursive, and then the remaining part of the letter which is printed. It would be very unusual to change writing styles while in the middle of writing a note, so when was this written? Was the first sentence merely a sa.ple of writing obtained during the intensive? And then the remaining parts added later?

    There is truly something very suspicious and Kristen’s disappearance, and it definitely should be investigated further.

    • Who writes ‘if you find me or this note’ in a suicide note, and then writes ‘no need to search for my body’?

      A murderer that’s who. It’s a message to all of us. It’s the clever writing of a master manipulator. A dr. Jekyll and mr. Hyde.

  • Who writes ‘if you find me or this note’ in a suicide note, and then writes ‘no need to search for my body’?

    That seems to contradict itself and doesn’t make much sense if she were truly not planning to be found.

    I agree, the note appears to have been written in two parts – the first sentence in cursive, and then the remaining part of the letter which is printed. It would be very unusual to change writing styles while in the middle of writing a note, so when was this written? Was the first sentence merely a sample of writing obtained during the intensive? And then the remaining parts added later?

    There is truly something very suspicious and Kristin’s disappearance, and it definitely should be investigated further.

  • Agree with almost all except I doubt they would have taken a chance in bringing her dead or alive to Resurrection Bay. Think they would have brought her somewhere she would have never expected to be. Especially with that note. Just my thoughts.

  • I agree completely with your analysis, with a few minor thoughts. Other than the first sentence, the main body of the note was written by one person, the printed signature was done by someone else and the second page was done by an entirely different person. I think that every one of the ones who went back to New York probably had their hand in this. Looking at the sign-in sheets, there is one of the ones who returned to New York whose printed signature has the same shape to the T in Kristin’s supposed printed signature. As Shivani says, your printing doesn’t really change and the printed signature on the suicide note does not match Kristin’s printing. Good analysis, Shivani!

    • Thank you for saying what you did about the final phrase of the note. I have always thought that phrase was tacked on by another hand, too. Sometimes I hesitate to say too much, despite feeling there is so much more to say and so, edit my thoughts. I wrote a long comment about that final phrase of the note and then decided to leave it be, scrapped the comment after hours of analyzing that phrase, its handwriting itself and the character of the writer behind it.

      Retired Inspector, every word you put here synchronizes with my theorizing as well. You have helped me a lot, since I question my ideas repeatedly when trying to learn and understand. So often the comments here help the rest of the commenters and readers to see more and to communicate more effectively. Your comment is especially helpful, to me.

      I’ve sat many times using more than one device in order to see and to compare or contrast these handwriting samples that Frank Parlato has published. The small n’s became just about hopeless for gaining insight, but you and I have both seen that “t” letter in more than only Kristin’s known writing samples, written, printed the same way. Whether or not it’s enough to make any conclusions, that stood out about that particular letter.

      Trying to get a sense of where Kristin might have died is not easy. I’ve really thought a lot about this and would doubt the Resurrection Bay area as the place of her demise entirely, if it were not for [Name Redacted] living right there. The location of Kristin’s death appears to have been deliberately padded with misdirectioning to point to the spot where the pickup truck was found. I’ve suspected that Kristin was put to death somewhere closer to her home or to a staff member’s home, closer to the site of the ESP intensive. I think that Kristin died not that long after she was driven away from the Westmark Hotel but could be wrong.

      She could have been removed from her and Heidi’s house to make certain that Heidi didn’t come home to find her before Kristin died or before Heidi would be able to complicate any conspirators’ plans. Then Kristin could have been bloodlessly murdered or even shot on some other ESP/”Nexium” individual’s property or behind someone’s closed doors. It is likely that she was made unconscious prior to death, to make killing her easier.

      I don’t mean to sound detached or cold when describing any of this but try not to let any of these comments be too emotionally charged. One has to pay close attention and to separate out some of the emotionality or subjective feelings or thoughts. Nevertheless this is heartbreaking. When thinking of Kristin and of the ones who have loved her so and who will always love her, one wants to do right by them and not to add to their sorrow.

  • That was a bizarre note and sounds like the same poison Keith may have used on his housemates was used by the Nxian’s on Kristin. After reading John Tighe’s experience, his organs were rotting away – he needed multiple blood transfusions and later on had to have part of his intestines removed because they were rotted away by some poison.

About the Author

Frank Parlato is an investigative journalist.

His work has been cited in hundreds of news outlets, like The New York Times, The Daily Mail, VICE News, CBS News, Fox News, New York Post, New York Daily News, Oxygen, Rolling Stone, People Magazine, The Sun, The Times of London, CBS Inside Edition, among many others in all five continents.

His work to expose and take down NXIVM is featured in books like “Captive” by Catherine Oxenberg, “Scarred” by Sarah Edmonson, “The Program” by Toni Natalie, and “NXIVM. La Secta Que Sedujo al Poder en México” by Juan Alberto Vasquez.

Parlato has been prominently featured on HBO’s docuseries “The Vow” and was the lead investigator and coordinating producer for Investigation Discovery’s “The Lost Women of NXIVM.” Parlato was also credited in the Starz docuseries "Seduced" for saving 'slave' women from being branded and escaping the sex-slave cult known as DOS.

Additionally, Parlato’s coverage of the group OneTaste, starting in 2018, helped spark an FBI investigation, which led to indictments of two of its leaders in 2023.

Parlato appeared on the Nancy Grace Show, Beyond the Headlines with Gretchen Carlson, Dr. Oz, American Greed, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt, where Parlato conducted the first-ever interview with Keith Raniere after his arrest. This was ironic, as many credit Parlato as one of the primary architects of his arrest and the cratering of the cult he founded.

Parlato is a consulting producer and appears in TNT's The Heiress and the Sex Cult, which premiered on May 22, 2022. Most recently, he consulted and appeared on Tubi's "Branded and Brainwashed: Inside NXIVM," which aired January, 2023.

IMDb — Frank Parlato

Contact Frank with tips or for help.
Phone / Text: (305) 783-7083