Violet has told the story of how she had a single sexual experience with Keith Alan Raniere. He tried for some time, Violet recalled, to get her into a sexual encounter.
Keith Raniere is not my enemy, even to this day.
But even after I left him, I would have never, ever considered going back to him or joining Nxivm.
I think the big warning, red flag for me was that in order to get me to have sex with him, for which he tried for days, was that he said ‘sex doesn’t matter’ – that it was like playing the piano or playing tennis. It is casual and should be free – and yet it did matter to him.
Once I had sex with him – just once – he wanted to claim ownership of me. Right after he had an orgasm, he said to me “Now you are mine forever.”
As I said before, this frightened me – and though he had been quite docile, and gentle – I saw a side of him – it was in his eyes – that I knew could be extremely dangerous.
So, I got away.
Of course, it is possible that Keith taught some good things. Nxivm helped some people. But no matter what great things they taught, the leadership was harming people and using the money gotten from deception to seriously harm innocent people.
Still, I really never thought of Keith as a monster until much later, when I saw what he did to destroy other people.
At the time I knew him, I thought he was eccentric, egotistical and sort of kinky. He claimed his polygamy was a more evolved way to live.
During the time he was trying to persuade me to have sex with him, Keith told me many things.
Men often try to show off their importance, their talents and abilities to encourage women to go to bed with them or that they will be worthy mates. Even if a polygamous one.
Naturally, the topic turned at one point to money. He brought it up. He told me that he had nothing, no assets, zero, nothing in his name. Then he said with a knowing look, ‘It is not how much you have in your name that is important. It is how much money you control.’
Clearly, he used the money he controlled to hurt people.
Which brings me back to why didn’t I ever take a course from Keith.
Skip the deception, Keith’s non-transparency; his hiding his kinky cult from his general students – the money he ‘controlled’ was used to attack his enemies.
Compassionate people do not have many enemies. And if they do, they love their enemies, not try to destroy them.
Keith always claimed he was the most compassionate man in the world. Yet, he had many enemies.
I am not saying Keith Raniere never did violent things – most of his warfare was psychological – but it appeared he might have done physical violence or tried to do so.
For me, although I thought the sister wives were doing a full-court press on me to join Keith’s harem – by having sex with him – and I did succumb eventually to having a sexual encounter with Raniere – I am the one that got away.
And for those who criticize me – remember I had the foresight and insight to know he was not right – and I left. Stealthily, true enough – but I left – when so many other women he targeted failed to get away.