Susan Dones questions whether Barbara Bouchey [above] was the author of a recent post.
By Susan Dones
Whoever wrote the post: “One of the NXIVM 9: Our famous resignation letter has resurrected with new lies” should step forward and identify herself.
Of course, I suspect some of us already know. There are some of us who know Barbara Bouchey really well.
She is the one that writes with the ellipses (… in between words …). I have emails and texts that show this is her writing style. You state that Barbara will not post on the blog… some of us know that is a half truth.
There are those of us who know Barbara writes or tells other people things to write and then has them post them for her or send them to Frank on her behalf. So, you’re not fooling us with “Barbara doesn’t post on the blog.” She just does the Raniere form of posting. She gets others to do it for her, so she can have “clean hands”.
Barbara would easily recall who was sent letters and what they contained. I don’t even have that information. I don’t have the two different letters.
Barbara recalls the “massive loan”. It was her massive loan to Raniere and she also asked other students to lend Raniere money that she personally signed for.
Barbara refers to Raniere by his first name, Keith (he was her lover for years). I call him Raniere.
Clare Bronfman, in one of her lawsuits against Barbara, claimed that Barbara tried to extort money from her, showing the resignation letter to the board. BINGO! Barbara had to have a hand in writing this post.
NXIVM tried to claim extortion in my case, not Clare.
This post was from one of the nine people who left in 2009; the title and the content of the post are a giveaway. It wasn’t me, Susan Dones. I own my work on the blog.
I know most of the other women who left with me didn’t know Clare Bronfman very well.
I would hate to see the other seven women get dragged into a court case because Barbara (or whoever wrote this) doesn’t have the guts to speak for herself
If you’re going to write something that is so easy to pinpoint within a small group of people, own it, or you might harm everyone involved. That is the ethical thing to do.
Frank Parlato 
Janine Morrison 
J.J. O'Hara 
Richard Luthmann 
Marie White 
Paul Serran
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[…] reply to Hiding out. That’s incorrect. The author of the article is Judy Katz. It was posted on Barbara […]
Nothing in Angela Ucci’s “coming out” post changes my opinion one bit about Barbara Bouchey. Once again, I suggest that if anyone wants to really understand Barbara, all they have to do is read through her self-important, breath-taking life story at BarbaraBouchey.net.
Seriously, who writes that kind of stuff about themselves? And who creates a special website where people can go to read about how wonderful you are. (It’s kind of like starting your own fan club and hoping some fans will join)
And here’s a question for Christine Marie: Are you being paid – or have you ever been paid – to serve as a Media Coach by Barbara? A simple “Yes” or “No” will suffice – and rest assured, your answered will be fact-checked.
And lastly, here are some questions for Barbara herself (Maybe Christine can get answers for us since Saint Barbara doesn’t read trash like the Frank Report):
(1) – How much did you earn in total throughout the time that you “managed” the Bronfmans’ funds?
(2) – How many other NXIVM members did you have as clients during the time you were involved with the cult and how much did you earn in total for managing their money?
(3) – How much did you get paid from NXIVM throughout the time that you worked for them and did you declare all that money as income on your tax returns?
(4) – How many new members did you recruit for NXIVM and how much do you estimate they paid in fees for NXIVM classes? Have you done anything to repay any of those funds to those people?
(5) – Did you encourage or require your staff to attend NXIVM courses? Did you ever fire, demote, or fail to promote anyone for not doing so?
(6) – Did you have NXIVM make presentations to your non-NXIVM clients at your firm’s holiday parties?
(7) – Did you, in fact, max out all your credit cards just days/hours before you filed for bankruptcy?
(8) – What have you personally done to get anyone out of NXIVM since you left?
(9) – Did you ever state that you wanted to use Keith’s “tech” to start your own executive training program?
(10) – Are you still trying to negotiate a book deal to tell your story to the world?
Here you are again .this is a comment from another post.Any reason you are reposting it?Sounds like KK
That’s incorrect. The author of the article is Judy Katz. It was pasted on Barbara’s new web site by me, because I put up her web site, and I needed an interim “About Barbara” piece because I wanted something on there right away. The original article is here: http://technorazzi.com/the-barbara-bouchey-story-humble-beginnings-to-great-success-beating-nxivm/ I will fix to clarify that on her site. No, Susan, I am not her media coach, nor anyone’s media coach. I do, however, have knowledge in personal branding. Everyone has a personal brand, whether they like it or not. It is important for all survivors to take charge and be on control of their online presence. This way, when there are misrepresentations in the media (like the endless misrepresentations about her in the comments on this blog), there is a place someone can go for factual information.
Also, just to be clear, my motive in defending Barbara or Sarah or anyone is not monetary in any way. (Yes, I defended Sarah – see http://www.victimblaming.org, another web site I am working on.) I cannot sit back and watch people I know be publicly humiliated and placed in a false light by anonymous Internet trolls or by licensed psychiatrists. Frankly, Barbara did not even want a web site. I have been pushing her to do this for years! Furthermore, it is not kind to shame her for the photo editing that photographers did. She does not do photo editing! Nonetheless it is a beautiful photo. I asked for the unedited photos, and they are just as beautiful.
I am the force behind trying to convince Barbara to reclaim her public dignity and personal legacy. Why? Because I know what it feels like to be publicly misrepresented, humiliated and victim blamed. For me, the public humiliation after the fact was far worse than the physical suffering I endured. And by the way, Keith tried to get me tied up with a slave contract too – in 1998-ish. No one knows my story, but what I learned since then is why I reached out to offer support to Barbara when I saw her being attacked by NXIVM.
Susan, I am sorry for everything you have gone through, and for publicly calling you out. I just thought Barbara deserved an apology for beimg accused of writing a post she did not write. That probably didn’t help matters. I cannot begin to imagine what you have been through, or Kristin or any of you. Please know that I have also heard stories from Barbara which the public does not know, and her story matters too. What she has endured behind closed doors for so many years is also horrifying in its own right. I do not know how she survived that, followed by an epic legal assault involving over 800 filings totaling 100,000+ pages, followed by the most brutal cyberbullying, online harassment and public misrepresentation I have ever personally witnessed.
THIS is why I respect her and defend her with the truth.
Every survivor deserves to be treated with dignity.
It is absolutely the right thing for all of us to do. We should focus on the predators, not on the flaws of the prey.
ONE WHO WAS THERE…COMES OUT
What began as a few comments to other posts on this blog as one who was there has spawned a vicious and unfair attack on Barbara Bouchey by Susan Dones and others. Susan has not only authored several lengthy insulting comments, a brand new story blaming Barbara for my words, imported new things I never said but also… spent considerable time and energy to copy / paste the negative comments into the more recent positive posts Frank wrote about Barb.
It is not only hateful and disturbing but makes it necessary for me “out myself.” I will be addressing my few comments and several of Susan’s with attempts to clear up any confusion that either she or the reader may have. FYI…I was enjoying anonymity… as I have been lied about in court filings and harassed by Nxivm in the past.
Points of clarification….
1. The comment was to a posting on Dec. 17th by “A woman from the inside tears apart Clare’s note of support of Raniere.” Frank reposted my comment the next day under a new heading “One of the Nxivm 9: Our famous resignation letter has resurrected with new lies”… which I was unaware of and was not my intention. In a nutshell, this woman on the inside is calling Clare out on “lying” in her letter to 20/20 producers. My comment was from personal experience and things already on public record anyhow….so I fail to understand Susan’s comments about the “harm to others and getting us dragged into court”.
2. Susan has likened my style of writing to Barbara. She would not know my style as she has never seen it. I can assure you that Barbara has never asked me to post anything on her behalf and does not choose to do so herself for reasons that Susan and others are well aware of…
The Bronfman sisters have a pending lawsuit against Frank Parlato… in which Barbara was their financial planner. Not only has she been accused of colluding with adversaries against Nxivm in their other lawsuits (i.e. Plyams, Ross, O’Hara, Dones)… but has also weathered previous attempts by the Bronfmans to have her business licenses removed. She is likely to be deposed again in this case and has decided against the risk of being involved with frank and this blog in any form…which can be verified by Frank.
3. My comment to the Dec 17th post began with “ This is someone who has known Clare and many of us who left” – in reference to the author of the post. Susan’s subsequent reference to Barbara knowing Clare best is irrelevant.
4. I made statements on this post…as I do have an experience of Clare lying about me in court filings regarding our resignation letter (which frank has posted on the blog and exists in several court filings) and claims of extortion (which are also of public record by both Nxivm and Clare and more recently by Alex Betancourt and Emiliano Salinas). We all know this is ridiculous and have to question how my repeating any of it will cause harm.
I do, however, recognize what Susan is engaged in as a destructive campaign to discredit Barbara in the public eye. Quite frankly, this is right out of Nxivm’s playbook….like labeling people as suppressive to discredit and further abuse them…this is obvious and intentional harm.
I am saddens me to have been dragged into this cruel vendetta against Barbara and I would stand by any of the Nxivm 9 who were being falsely accused or slandered. I have always been proud of everyone one of us for questioning Keith about what we didn’t agree with and severing our relationship to Nxivm when we realized that his conduct and that of the leadership did not match our values. I felt it an honor to stand with these woman.
I remain supportive of anyone who has been victimized by this gang, and will continue to be truthfull and honest about everything that occurred.
Thanks for listening,
Angela Ucci
This is amazing. What a brave and classy thing to do – sacrifice your anonymity to set the record straight for a fellow NXIVM survivor whose reputation was being unfairly, brutally and repeatedly knifed. I hope that a public apology will be forthcoming, that Frank will delete the reposting of the false and negative comments designed to diminish from the positive post about Barbara, and that Frank will put new terms & conditions in place to make it a violation to do unfounded personal attacks against survivors. Wow. The cruel ways that this “knifing committee” has treated her (and I’m not singling out Susan), but frankly, this is an epic story in and of itself. Angela, may your post be the beginning of a change, an increase in ethical behavior and support that survivors have for each other. I am hoping for more kindness, honesty, unity and love.
I know both of these women quite well. Susan is extremely truthful and very protective of others. Barbara exaggerates all aspects of her life and only cares about herself.
Barbara’s latest puff-piece about her life story at BarbaraBouchey.net reeks of someone with a huge ego and an overblown sense of her own importance. And it leaves out a lot of facts that expose the REAL Barbara. Like how much money she made managing the Bronfmans’ money. (Hint: It’s more than she “lent” to Keith). Or like how much she earned as one of NXIVM’s highest paid staff.
Come on, Ya, tell everyone the whole truth about what you did when you were in NXIVM; about the fact that you required your staff to take ESP courses; about all the other students you recruited and convinced to piss away their life savings on ESP courses; about how pissed you were when Keith decided to replace you with Ivy. And tell everyone how your real dream was to take Keith’s tech and create your own executive training program.
And stop using photos of yourself that have obviously been photo-shopped. Where’s the honesty in that?
You are obviously obsessed with her .
I think it’s time we all move on from these kind of posts on both sides of playing field. I know both these women and they both were abused within the ranks of NXIVM. They did leave together but due to their personal issues they do not spend time together. It does not make one right or one wrong.
None of their close personal friends needs to defend the other on a public forum that is designed for exposure of NXIVM dirty laundry. Let’s let these women heal in their own time, in private and all be responsible adults about this.
Personally I don’t think anything other than NXIVM related issues should be made posts and it appears this was just a comment made under a post that was made into another post and started some infighting. Not good and not necessary.
I agree with this last comment that this post was aggressively negative and abusive. some people have commented that you, Susan Dones, are a hero and may look up to you. Unfortunately, possibly due to your Post Traumatic Stress you have become cruel and abrasive . I was beginning to have hope that some of the fallen devotees of the “Vanguard” had risen above the abuse they once endured and would be more compassionate and kind. Not the case here. You say you left many years ago, and yet this reads like a Facebook post gone bad.
I would expect more .
I would like to see more fact based news.I am not interested in a pissing match with ex-members .
I was never a devotee of Vanguard, I never spent time with him. We were not each other’s cup of tea. I was on of the lucky ones and spent most of my time outside of Albany.
Yes I suffered abused from other leaders and have PTSD but am in counseling.
This is a hot button for me when I feel others are putting innocent people at risk with their posting.
Please forgive me if i seems harsh. I know what it’s like to be sued and to not have the money to pay for a lawyer.
We should not be putting each other at risk, we should be protecting each other.
This is false and hurtful. 1. Barbara has always been transparent, forthright, and honest. In all the years that I have known her, I have never, ever known her to ask anyone to post on her behalf, or to secretly send something to a blog, including myself. It has never happened. Susan, perhaps this is something that people you know have done, or that you yourself have done, but it is not in Barbara’s character to be sneaky like that. 2. She did not tell me to post this in her defense, nor does she know that I am writing this. I am writing this because this post is unfair, unjust and wrong. 3. I am confused, Susan. Just a few days ago you texted me saying “Barbara IS sweet.” It makes no sense with what I see you have written here. Nor does it make sense with the positive, lofty things I have heard about you. 4. This post and the gloating, ever-so-snarky comments of SAY WHAT and VENN LOGIC (also wrong), come across petty, cruel and abusive instead of positive, kind and supportive. Fellow survivors, especially women, should be classy and have a code of honor to support each other rather than heap additional public humiliation on them, adding insult to injury. Frank, I am disappointed that you allowed your blog to be a sandbox for bullies to make false accusations and smear and re-traumatize victims. This took the credibility of your blog down 500% if you ask me.
Christina,
The story about the resignation letter put all of the NXIVM nine at risk without the owner of the post coming forward. If Clare Bronfman decided to file suit about it, she could drag everyone into court over that post.
Since my partner and I have won our case, we’d be safer; NXIVM said we’d tried to extort from them with the resignation letter. Of course, we own our case.
Clare said Barbara tried to extort from her in her legal cases against Barbara; the post had to come from Barbara as it was written in first person. So why would she not own her work as you have asked other on this blog to do?
For someone to say Barbara didn’t post on the blog is mind blowing. For them to say she didn’t have others post for her seems impossible. How would a story, written in first person the resignation letter & her experience about her get on the blog? It just doesn’t make sense.
Fellow survivors should be honest and forthright and not put others at risk. That’s class in my book. If you do something that might harm my friends who have left by being irresponsible, I’m going to protect them. If it means calling someone out, I’ll do it. If someone sees that as mean, so be it. Getting someone sued is worse.
Maybe you don’t know her as well as some of us do or know everything we know about her.
You seem to be willing to be the pot calling the kettle black by throwing stones at me in your postings. Funny how you seem to be fighting Barbara’s battles on the blog. I guess that’s what a media couch does.
I’m just trying to protect my friends who have managed to not get sued.
For those wondering about “The NXIVM Nine”. We left together but we don’t hang out or do things together. We live in different parts of the States. Some of us still talk now & then but it’s not like we’re a tight group.
Wow…What a hate filled posting. Makes me wonder if the end result of belonging to this group is becoming like them. People claiming to have moved on are horrible to each other. So sad.
Let me see if I’m clear about this
Three people were sued from the NXIVM 9
Dones and her partner said NXIVM claimed they tried extortion, but they were found not guilty of this.
Bouchey was sued and has said Clare Bronfman claimed Bouchey tried to extort money from her; this case was dropped due to inactivity.
Now a “friend” is claiming Bouchey didn’t write a story posted on the blog written in “first person” telling of how Clare claimed in a court case against them that “this NXIVM 9 women attempted to extort money from her!
It only could be Bouchey if you ask me; who else could have written the story?
Maybe Bouchey didn’t post it but someone did for her.
Liar Liar pants on fire
This is what I have always hated about Barbara Bouchey; she treats everyone like we are stupid and cannot venn out a lie. So much like her ex-lover and ex-mentor Vanguard.
I like the “Clean Hands” reference so like her Vanguard, he taught her well.
Just can’t help yourself