Rare Video: Cult funny girl Nicki Clyne does top 12 photo captions

Miss Clyne at a more hefty weight.

Cult member, and former Battlestar Gallactica star, Nicki Clyne, does her “Top 12 Photo Captions” routine for V-Week 2016.

V-Week is the 10-day celebration of the nativity of cult leader, Keith Raniere, who has risen to worldwide fame recently for branding women on their pubic region with his initials.

Normally, this kind of talent is only seen by paying customers of V-Week, who pay more than $2,000 for a chance to offer tribute to NXIVM leader Raniere whose followers refer to him by his self given title of Vanguard.

Happily, readers of Frank Report will get to share in the fun for much less than $2,000.

A few samples of Ms. Clyne’s top 12 reveal some of the inscrutable terminology [word salad] of NXIVM:

No 10: I’m pretty sure it’s ethical because I don’t have abstraction.

No. 7: Maybe if we make it black and white, they won’t know we’ve been up for 47 hours.

No 6: I just don’t get why people call us a cult.

No. 5: I’m telling you, it’s a need.

No, 4  When Ethicists start talking about the levels of morality.

No. 1. OK guys, seriously, who farted.

Keith Raniere appears in the audience [in blue shirt and shorts] at 2:48- 2;52

Nicki uses a lot of ESP jargon. My favorite: “marinating in your essence.”


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Frank Parlato

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F. D. C. Willard
F. D. C. Willard
5 years ago

I don’t know what is weirder, Ms. Clyne’s performance, paying money to see it or the fact that they have people around who have to cheer. She has to present a shit show there and the audience has to act as if they would enjoy it…
It would be even better if they would use prerecorded laughter. Just think about it.

About the Author

Frank Parlato is an investigative journalist.

His work has been cited in hundreds of news outlets, like The New York Times, The Daily Mail, VICE News, CBS News, Fox News, New York Post, New York Daily News, Oxygen, Rolling Stone, People Magazine, The Sun, The Times of London, CBS Inside Edition, among many others in all five continents.

His work to expose and take down NXIVM is featured in books like “Captive” by Catherine Oxenberg, “Scarred” by Sarah Edmonson, “The Program” by Toni Natalie, and “NXIVM. La Secta Que Sedujo al Poder en México” by Juan Alberto Vasquez.

Parlato has been prominently featured on HBO’s docuseries “The Vow” and was the lead investigator and coordinating producer for Investigation Discovery’s “The Lost Women of NXIVM.” Parlato was also credited in the Starz docuseries "Seduced" for saving 'slave' women from being branded and escaping the sex-slave cult known as DOS.

Additionally, Parlato’s coverage of the group OneTaste, starting in 2018, helped spark an FBI investigation, which led to indictments of two of its leaders in 2023.

Parlato appeared on the Nancy Grace Show, Beyond the Headlines with Gretchen Carlson, Dr. Oz, American Greed, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt, where Parlato conducted the first-ever interview with Keith Raniere after his arrest. This was ironic, as many credit Parlato as one of the primary architects of his arrest and the cratering of the cult he founded.

Parlato is a consulting producer and appears in TNT's The Heiress and the Sex Cult, which premiered on May 22, 2022. Most recently, he consulted and appeared on Tubi's "Branded and Brainwashed: Inside NXIVM," which aired January, 2023.

IMDb — Frank Parlato

Contact Frank with tips or for help.
Phone / Text: (305) 783-7083
Email: frankreport76@gmail.com


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